Why did the Orphan go to church?
To call someone father.
Tell your adopted kid you want to take them back home and tell them their original parents want them, and get them all excited, then take them to the orphanage and tell them their parents died.
What does the 14 year old and the fetus inside her have in common. They both say, "Ohh sh*t my mom is going to kill me."
I had a new blonde" part's expert" woman call for parts. I needed 2 ought wire for a job. She calls NAPA auto and asks for twat wire.. the part's guy was assuming she didn't know about planned parenthood? .. 😂🤣
Wife: "Hi honey, I'm pregnant."
Husband: "Hi pregnant, I'm dad."
Wife: "No, you're not...."
what's the name of a cannibals favorite all you can eat buffet ? planned parenthood !
My wife and I have reached the decision that we do not want children.
If anyone does, please comment your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
What starts with the letter M, ends with -arriage and is a man's favorite thing? Miscarriage. That joke never gets old, just like the baby.
I was going to tell a joke about babies, but I decided to abort.
My pregnant wife said we were gonna name the kid Digiorno. She wouldn't tell me why until she got an abortion and told me, "It's not delivery, it's Digiorno."
How to tell your kid he's adopted:
Son, I'm a virgin.
Why is Helen Keller's child blind too? She always fed it with a fork!
Once upon a time the three baby was born I 2015 she was always cry for 2015 he loves her born date 🤗😈🤗🤕🤒no🤗🤑😱😎🙌🙏🙈🙉🙊
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and said, "Jill do you wanna?" Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and then they had some fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill so now they have a son.
My mom asked my doctor, "Why is my unvaccinated baby crying?"
The doctor replied, "He's going through a midlife crisis."
Nutted in her braces, now my kids are behind bars.
Guys, my sister's pregnant!
I'm finally a dad!
Why did the orphans like church so much?
So they had someone to call father...
How do you make a baby astronaut sleep?
You rock-it!
There was a cannibal who had a wife and eight kids.
