Parent jokes

One day, a man visited an orphanage.

Then he sees a kid crying. The man asked, "Where are your parents?"

The kid cries even harder.

Why do orphans air?

It’s invisible just like their parents.

Girl: Come over.

Orphan: I can’t.

Girl: My parents aren’t home.

Orphan: Oh, cool, something we have in common.

One man's trash is another man's treasure, he said when he found out his parents split up and he is being adopted.

Today, I filmed an unboxing video at my friend's funeral.

His parents weren't too happy.

What's the difference between a mother and a father? The mother always comes back from the shop.

Your dad died of hunger on the journey to find the milk.

When you are being spoon-fed and your mum says, "Here comes the airplane."

Why did the orphan cross the road?

So he can be hit by a car and be reunited with his parents.

The Emo kid wanted to go on a field trip, but he needed his parent's signature.

Why can't Oregon go to the doctor?

Because they need parents' signature.

I got in trouble in school today. The teacher said, "I'm gonna call your parents!"

I said, "Let me know when you find them." <3

What is a kid's favorite thing to do with their dad?

Play pretend dog in the bed.

What did the parents rearrange the furniture to punish a child?

Guess he was a stupid blind motherfucker 🖕 that didn't even know how to use a cane to figure out where they put the furniture.

The orphan turned 18, but he was happy because he didn't have to pay rent to his parents.

An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.

I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”

My ex was an orphan as a child.

I should have taken that as the first sign.

If her parents didn’t want her, why would I?

You have to be a good mom to be a MILF.

Me when the your, uh, uhhhh, when your me when the your, uhhh, uhhhhh, mom.

How did the blind boy's parents punish him?

Rearrange the furniture.