Parent jokes
Why can't an orphan have sex?
Because they can't call them "daddy."
My parents came back from their vacation in Florida, and all I got is this lousy nursemaid from Miami named mammie.
I went up to a kid and asked, "Are you an orphan?" They said, "Yes, what gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."
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(Shared from the "Wolves E-genda" app.)
An orphan walks into a bar and the barman says, "What are you doing here? You need parent's permission!"
"Oh no, who will I ask?" the orphan says.
Why can’t orphans order from Costa?
They need a parent or guardian with them.
Mom: There is so much of the dog's dirty ball marks.
Me: *umm ohh no* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA dirty balls!
It is now legal to bully an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Just to an orphan.
Orphan: You're stupid.
You: You're so ugly, it's the reason your parents are dead.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute?
Because they needed someone to call "daddy".
My parents gave me a blowjob. It was a blowtastic time!
Orphan boy: "Your dad is probably disappointed in you. I mean, look at you."
Me: "Well, at least my parents kept me. Where are yours?"
Friend 1: What's your favorite drink or food?
Friend 2: Pizza.
Friend 3: Donuts.
Friend 4: I don't eat food but I do drink bleach.
Friend 1: (calling the suicide hotline)
Friend 2: (Calling the parents)
How do you get chewing gum out of a child's hair? Cancer.
Why can't orphans go to an amusement park?
Because they don't have parents!
The other day I was in the park and got bored, so I found an orphan and punched him in the face, laughed at him, and said, "Whatcha gonna do, tell your parents?"
What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, because his parents ran away.
Double whammy. Orphan jokes are like a kid with cancer; it never gets old. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣👌👌👌👌👌
Why is there only 363 days in an orphan calendar? Because they don't have Mother's Day or Father's Day.
Principal: You're being bad. I'm gonna need to call your parents!
Orphan: *sits there sadly*
My mom said she wanted to be a comedian when she grows up. So after she was an adult, she had kids. When they were old enough, she told them you could be whatever you want...