Parent jokes
A woman buys a house, but she doesn't know what to name the house, so she stuck her head outside and heard "Hairy butt," so she named the house Hairy Butt.
The next month she had a baby, but she didn't know what to name him, so she stuck her head outside and heard "Crack," so she named the baby Crack.
After a year or two she lost him, so she called the police and said, "Help! I looked all over my hairy butt, but I couldn't find my little crack."
You can get into a fight with an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If orphans aren’t religious, they really have no father. 😂
What do orphans call their parents?
Unicorns because they don’t exist.
What does the orphan have in common with Batman? They both lost their parents.
Mom: It's time for sleep.
Baby: Is that what you think, huh?
Mom: *gives baby pacifier*
Baby: Nice try, hobo.
Mom: Well, I'll come back later to see if he's gone asleep.
*few hours later*
Baby: *still awake*
Mom: Why IS HE NOT ASLEEP?!
Baby: Lol, I told you nice try haha.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They put her in a circle room and told her to find the penny in the corner.
Me: I’m gonna smite the life out of you!!!
Orphan: What! No! Please no!
Me: What you gonna do? Run home and tell your parents? Wait, I forgot, you don’t have a home or parents!!!!
When your parents say, "We are sorry that you are here," what do you think of that?
I think that you're an accident!
Once I saw a girl crying and asked, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at orphanages.
Why do orphans go to church?
So at least they will have someone to call father.
What's the difference between parents and depression? At least one of them leaves you.
Dad, am I adopted?
NO! Why would I ever choose you?
I watched the series of "Unfortunate Events" 4 times, all the shows 4 times. I am crying. I am trying to finish the rest, then my brother comes in and says it is PG (Parental Guidance). After that, my brother called me a baby, then he pushed me off my bed. 😭
A teacher asked his students a math question.
"You have one dollar. Your parents give you five dollars. How much money do you have?"
After some thinking, about half the class raised their hands. The teacher called on a little girl in the front.
"One dollar!" she said.
Me: Shut up! If you don't shut up, I'm gonna tell your parents!
You: Why? I don't have any.
Why can't orphans sign up for sports?
They have to have a parent's signature.
What does a baby computer call its father? Data.
Boy and girl playing hide and seek... girl: "I found you." Boy: "What gave me away?" Girl: "Ur parents obviously."
A boi found a magic vase and a genie came out and told him he had one wish. The boy said, "I wanna be like Batman." The genie said, "OK, your wish is granted."
The boy came home later that day and his parents were dead.