(As per Cosmo's request)
Jack opened his drying eyes, awoken by a piercing ray of sunlight shining through crooked blinds. A gentle smell wafted in from the corner of what his temporarily blinded eyes knew to be a dilapidated kitchen. It was the one good thing about his life, that smell. He closed his eyes once more and awaited his call.
“Jacky, breakfast time!” beckoned that oh-so-familiar girlish voice. “Oh, silly me, the handcuffs!”
The same footsteps he always heard, the only ones, tapped along the tile floor as each one of Jack’s limbs were freed from the cold metal that imprisoned them. He’d learned not to resist it, and the acceptance was blissful.
Jack slowly dragged himself to the kitchen table, still adjusting his eyes to the light. Moments later, a bowl was slid over to him by a hand he’d become all too familiar with. Oatmeal with little bits of dried apple mixed in. Even after four years, he still liked it.
“Thank you, Randy,” Jack muttered.
“Jill,” said the girl’s voice across from him. The girl’s voice vanished.
“You call me Randy when I’m having my way with you, boy. Understood?” said the balding, sweat-stained man from whom Jill’s voice came.
“Yes, sir.”
“Now hurry up and eat your food. I want to have some more fun before you expire.”
Jack ate obediently, but deep down he grew concerned. Expired? What could Randy mean by...expired?
He thought back to the day everything went wrong. The day he was deceived. His 14th birthday.
Four years...already? Was Jack really about to be an adult? Then expired means...
Jack stood up quickly, hitting his knees on the table with a thud.
“I need to go to the bathroom.”
“Which one?”
“The one you don’t like to watch,” Jack replied. Randy waved him away dismissively.
Jack paced around the small shack searching for the bathroom door. He passed the heavily locked front door, each lock a memento of his past escape attempts. Finally, he entered the bathroom. No lock, he had to be fast.
Jack searched desperately around the room for anything he could use. If this was his last round before Randy was through with him, it might be his only chance to escape. He opened drawers, scrounged through cupboards, scoured every inch of the floor, but found a small mirror.
“Almost done, Jacky?” called the voice of Jill. “Don’t keep daddy waiting.” grumbled Randy.
Startled, Jack lost his grip on the mirror. Jack froze the second it fell to the floor and shattered.
“Shit...shit!” he whispered sharply, trying to brush the mess away. In doing so, he found a shard large enough to be held. “This’ll have to do...”
Jack slid the shard in his pocket and returned to the living room he had woken up in. The same old deflated mattress was still there, iron bars and all. Randy lay sprawled across it, a pink lace bra covering his hairy chest, matching panties withholding his dense, greasy bush. His waist had grown so fat they hardly fit, until...
SNAP!
The panties seemed to vanish as the waistband broke, springing his embarrassing, already erect penis from side to side.
“Oopsies,” he cooed.
Jack took off his clothes, as was the ritual, and laid them at the foot of the mattress. His sore knees pressed into the stained fabric while he inched closer to Randy’s pulsating cock. Licking his lips, Jack bent down and took the member into his mouth. Randy groaned with pleasure as Jack’s tongue swirled around his tip, diving into the lining of his foreskin to gather what curds of smegma were present. Jack’s nausea at this had vanished long ago, he was merely going through the motions before enacting his plan.
As he throated Randy’s dick over and over again, the man who had trapped Jack for so long began to thrust upward into his mouth, lightly scratching his face with the overgrown pubes that lined the base of his cock. Jack wiggled his tongue in Randy’s urethra, just how he liked it. Anything to get this over with quicker.
“Ungh, fuck...don’t stop Jack, you dirty little whore...I’m so close,” Randy moaned.
Jack sucked harder and harder, faster and faster, all while his hand slowly inched toward the makeshift blade in his pants behind him. With the weapon in hand, Jack gave it everything he had.
“MMMPH FUCK YES, CMON BABY GIVE IT TO ME! OH JACK, OH, OH FUCK, I’M G-GONNA CUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!” screamed Randy, closing his eyes tightly.
He threw his head back and Jack took his chance. With one fell swoop of the glass shard, he sliced Randy’s dick clean off, spitting the half of it still in his mouth out. Jack lunged at the injured Randy, glass still in hand.
“AAARRGGHHHHHH, FUCK! HAAH...FUCK!” Randy cried, semen oozing out of his bloody stump of a penis. He opened his eyes just as Jack thrust the blade straight into his right one, then his left. Left weak from the orgasm, Randy could hardly fight back.
(Continued in comments)
Anonymous (Original Author)
“YOU LITTLE BITCH!!! I’M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU!” Randy shrieked, swinging violently in the air as he struggled to stand up. He landed a few hits on Jack, but not before the boy could grab the handcuffs that had locked him to this mattress so many times before. It wasn’t long before Randy found himself completely at Jack’s mercy, unable to move or see. Jack pulled Randy’s head up by his long, greasy hair. He remembered when he used to brush it for “Jill,” and tell her how much he loved her. Tears began to well up in Jack’s eyes as he raised his fists, bringing them down over and over again on Randy’s frail, fat face.
“THIS…IS…FOR…WHAT…YOU…TOOK…FROM ME!!!” Jack cried, mutilating Randy’s face with his fists. His bloody, empty eye sockets seemed to look Jack in the face begging for mercy. Mercy? Jack was NEVER given mercy. And Randy wouldn’t be any different.
As Jack walked around to position himself behind Randy’s head, the man spit out his broken teeth, lips quivering as he tried to make out the word “please.” Jack paid no attention, remembering all that was taken from him as he beat his cock into an erection, then yanked Randy’s head back violently.
“You don’t deserve any punishment I could give you. You deserve far, far worse. You’re a sick fucking degenerate, Randy, and I hope the leagues of Hell take their time torturing you. I would say goodbye, but there will be no God with you, as the saying suggests. So instead…”
Jack smacked his dick across Randy’s lips. “Good fucking riddance.”
Jack forced himself into Randy’s blood-pooled throat, every aching scream muted by the repeated thrusting of his cock deep inside his captor. Randy choked and coughed, desperately searching for a way to breathe. Jack gave him no such option. With each intense thrust, he remembered the life he had before. His mother, whose embrace he couldn’t wait to fall into once more. His father, who he knew would guide him through the hardships to come. His friends who he’d missed so deeply. All the pleasures of a free life. He remembered Jill, the girl he had fallen in love with, and what a tragic disaster that followed. Four years ripped from his hands, taken from him. And so, suffocating the last remnants of air from Randy’s lungs, Jack finished, and ripped away the life of the man who had caused him such deep torment.
It was finished.
-Vinxity🩶
Holy shit, this is like really good lol
Cosmo idk
frfr
Anonymous (Original Author)
Thank you very much!! It's not what I typically write but I had to keep with tradition, glad you enjoyed it!
Cosmo idk
its beautiful though
Anonymous (Original Author)
I did try to lean away from the "grotesque gay sex" aspect of the series with this one, it felt more fitting to conclude the story with something good for a change.
-Vinxity🩶
I can’t get into the google doc😭
Anonymous (Original Author)
Oh, my apologies! Let me see if I can fix that
Anonymous (Original Author)
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1KeSdfkzMruQOl3UCELMMdSYiFq5GqbF-pDB7B0bw8eM/edit?usp=sharing
Anonymous (Original Author)
Here, try this
mal
wje history right here
Cosmo idk
still got no 2 in one of my google accs
mal
i have a random one i think
Cosmo idk
my mom thought i was gay because she ran through all of the google docs on that acc😭
mal
lmao
Cosmo idk
yepp
Anonymous (Original Author)
I'm awfully sorry, in a roundabout way I feel at fault for that 😅
Cosmo idk
it was absolutely hilarious
mal
you are gay so its fine
Cosmo idk
there was no way to explain the context behind it
Cosmo idk
bitch stfu
mal
no
Cosmo idk
bitch open the fuck down
mal
huh?
Cosmo idk
(inverse of stfu)
mal
...
Cosmo idk
lmaoo
Cosmo idk
dumbass
Cosmo idk
ugh i miss my phone
United Kingdom UK
Otfd
mal
loser
United Kingdom UK
Getting your phone confiscated at youre age
mal
embaaaaaaaaarrassing
United Kingdom UK
Fr
United Kingdom UK
I kept my phone ever since it was given to me
United Kingdom UK
No confiscations here
Cosmo idk
imma tell starmer lets see what he thinks
United Kingdom UK
Aslong as he doesnt see what i do in my freetime im fine
Cosmo idk
mossads telling him what ur doin
United Kingdom UK
I had to search up what mossad means
Cosmo idk
jew spies
United Kingdom UK
I already googled it
Cosmo idk
congrats
United Kingdom UK
Uhh
United Kingdom UK
Thanks
mal
slowpoke
mal
thats ironic
mal
that message took forever to send
mal
thats funny timing
Cosmo idk
ur also slow sometimes
United Kingdom UK
Ha
United Kingdom UK
Sometimes
Cosmo idk
and also im doin cambridge bs
Cosmo idk
man you oughta sat cambridge on fire for me
Cosmo idk
pls
-Vinxity🩶
Real
United Kingdom UK
The city?
Cosmo idk
for the sake of all people who take courses from cambridge
Cosmo idk
yes
Cosmo idk
make it glow
United Kingdom UK
That'd kill my grandma
Cosmo idk
and emit toxic ashes
Cosmo idk
oh mbmb
United Kingdom UK
Lmao
Cosmo idk
not all of cambridge
United Kingdom UK
Why is is called cambridge anyways
United Kingdom UK
Its not a bridge
Cosmo idk
cuz like that was the old name for london or something i think
United Kingdom UK
..
United Kingdom UK
What are you talking about
mal
i guy named cam thought of the name while crossing a bridge
Cosmo idk
wowww
United Kingdom UK
Did they demolish the bridge to build cambridge?
Cosmo idk
ig so
United Kingdom UK
Also it should be called cam's bridge if thats the case
mal
no they didnt
mal
he spoke like a toddler
mal
cam! bridge! cambridge
United Kingdom UK
But britain always wants all the credit so im not surprisdd
United Kingdom UK
Maybe he was a caveman walking across a stone
mal
maybe
mal
guys i have oreos
United Kingdom UK
Ook! Cam brig!
United Kingdom UK
The bridge was better
Cosmo idk
uh
Bree 988
this is tuf
Bree 988
oh hi cosmo
Bree 988
I HATE MAINING AS TAPH
Bree 988
BUT I GOTTA GET THE MILESTONES
-Vinxity🩶
I want peanut butter Oreos rn
mal
hi bree
-Vinxity🩶
Do those even exist..!
Bree 988
HI MAL
Bree 988
they do
-Vinxity🩶
OMGGG YASSS
Bree 988
wait
mal
i have the thin tiramisu ones
Bree 988
you can make them tioo
mal
HII
Bree 988
AHSIUFHEIFHEOUHFEFOR3
-Vinxity🩶
wait, my brothers deathly allergic to peanut butter lol
Bree 988
Mb for not talkin on call
Bree 988
oh damn
Cosmo idk
L
Bree 988
the reason why tho was because i was blasting music and paying forsaken AND my door was wide open and my mom was awake </3
Bree 988
i fucking hate noli with all my FUCKING GUTS
Cosmo idk
lmao
United Kingdom UK
Bro didnt install the peanut butter resistance update
Cosmo idk
...
Cosmo idk
lmaooo
United Kingdom UK
As a half italian those sound fire
Bree 988
cool
Bree 988
my brain hurts
mal
yes
United Kingdom UK
Headache?
United Kingdom UK
Ø
United Kingdom UK
I dont know what to say rn
United Kingdom UK
Lets talk abt the weather
Bree 988
i hate warm weather
Bree 988
it pisses me off ,3
mal
i wish it was warm here
United Kingdom UK
Your weather is warm?
Bree 988
HAVE MY CLIMATE
Bree 988
HERE
United Kingdom UK
My hands are called
Bree 988
ITS 70 AND HIGHER
Bree 988
I JUSTT WANT SNOWW
mal
cept yesterday i went tubing with my friends on a MASSIVE hill and we got 45 people to go at once all connected
mal
it was insane
Bree 988
WHAT
Bree 988
you shoulda invited me </3
Cosmo idk
ooh i went tubing today
Cosmo idk
it wasnt as snowy as where you live but it was still fun
United Kingdom UK
Atleast its fahrenheit
Cosmo idk
70c is fun
United Kingdom UK
And deadly
Bree 988
lucky bastard
Cosmo idk
thats how hot my chromebook used to get to
mal
we were in the mountains further north so it was even more snowy
Cosmo idk
actually it got up to 80
Bree 988
what
Cosmo idk
mmmmm
Bree 988
i love the freezing weather
United Kingdom UK
Mod abuse
Cosmo idk
its so dry in northern az now
United Kingdom UK
Warm weather is overrated
Cosmo idk
but im goin skiing tmrw so yay
Bree 988
wowies
Cosmo idk
cold weather is sad
Bree 988
yeah
United Kingdom UK
When its cold you can just wear as much layers until youre warm
Bree 988
ye
Cosmo idk
i hate layering up
United Kingdom UK
Tbh same
Cosmo idk
i rarely have to wear a sweater cuz its so nice
Cosmo idk
especially now
United Kingdom UK
But atleast you can moderate cold temperature
mal
i love layers
Cosmo idk
Pools
Cosmo idk
Ac
Cosmo idk
ice cream
Cosmo idk
shade
Cosmo idk
indoor gyms
United Kingdom UK
You think im rich enough to have one?
Cosmo idk
theres a lot of community pools where i live
United Kingdom UK
I only eat ice cream as a snack tbh
United Kingdom UK
It tastes good
Cosmo idk
its a lifesaver
Cosmo idk
but pools get so nice during the summer
United Kingdom UK
Theyre uncomfortable as an autist
Cosmo idk
even when its like 50c (118 or so F)
Cosmo idk
i can speak metric
United Kingdom UK
When its cold you can piss in the pool to make it warm
Cosmo idk
im bilingual
Cosmo idk
when its warm you dont gotta piss in the pool
Cosmo idk
you gotta piss out of the pool to cool down the ground from burning your feet
United Kingdom UK
I dont want warm water unless its piss flavoured
Cosmo idk
it gets hot enough to make eggs
Cosmo idk
thats what community pools are for
United Kingdom UK
I dont got that much community pools here
Cosmo idk
loser
United Kingdom UK
I still got layers
Cosmo idk
i still get to cool down during summers
Cosmo idk
and it rarely gets cold during the winter
Cosmo idk
its so nice down south now
Cosmo idk
even though it rained a bit
United Kingdom UK
Thats not smth to brag about
United Kingdom UK
The cold is what makes wintrr good
Cosmo idk
idc about cold
United Kingdom UK
Cold > hot
Bree 988
uh
Bree 988
why did it send twice
Cosmo idk
glitches
Cosmo idk
they happen a lot
Cosmo idk
uh no?
United Kingdom UK
Cold is better
Cosmo idk
hot has > energy
Cosmo idk
cold is slower
Cosmo idk
and denser
Cosmo idk
dont be dense
Cosmo idk
boy i can get verryyyyyy veryyyyy nerdy about ts
United Kingdom UK
Hah
United Kingdom UK
Nerd
Cosmo idk
tyty
Cosmo idk
you also got the tism so you cant insult me about it
United Kingdom UK
I thought you said ypu got the tism once
Cosmo idk
i do
United Kingdom UK
Hah
United Kingdom UK
Nerdy + has the tism
United Kingdom UK
Atleast im not nerdt
Cosmo idk
yeah sure
mal
nerdtistic
Cosmo idk
mal its a shame you dont got someone to do something with related to something here
United Kingdom UK
Nerdtism
United Kingdom UK
Emphasis on tism
Cosmo idk
nerdy
United Kingdom UK
What
Cosmo idk
inside joke
mal
what does that even mean
United Kingdom UK
Hah
Cosmo idk
apples n doctor
United Kingdom UK
Inside joke
mal
??
United Kingdom UK
Hah
United Kingdom UK
Inside joke
United Kingdom UK
"Inside joke"
mayziee.
istg.
mal
.....
mayziee.
uh..
mayziee.
too much?
mal
yes 😭
United Kingdom UK
Illegally so
Bree 988
?
Bree 988
what happened
mayziee.
uh i js siad whats on my mind..
Bree 988
is it THOSE thoughts?
mayziee.
huh?
mayziee.
what thoughts?
Bree 988
because it isn't your fault
Bree 988
like thinking of harming yourself.
mayziee.
uhm
United Kingdom UK
No
mayziee.
^
Bree 988
Charlie.
Bree 988
LET ME HELP YOU
mayziee.
YES !!
Bree 988
YESSS
Bree 988
DHCIEHFEIUHFCF
Bree 988
WE ARE SOOO GONN HAVEFUN
Bree 988
waiitttt twin twin i have another idea
mayziee.
spill?
Bree 988
its tufff trust
United Kingdom UK
I would help but i live on a different country
mayziee.
no thats hot.
Bree 988
WHAT THE FUCK
Bree 988
wait true
Bree 988
:3
mayziee.
huh
mayziee.
deal
Bree 988
yes
mayziee.
lets delete out plotting
Bree 988
yes
United Kingdom UK
Try feeding her to pigs
United Kingdom UK
I heard they could eat bonr
mayziee.
yall
Bree 988
yes
Bree 988
?
mayziee.
yu have no idea how much she hurt me
Bree 988
oh hell no.
mayziee.
like.
mayziee.
for a day i couldnt talk in more than 3 word sentances
mayziee.
and
mayziee.
js dry
mayziee.
you saw it bree
Bree 988
yeah
mayziee.
and im sturgglig to talk normal
mayziee.
i js wanna get off all sites forever
mayziee.
js sleep
mayziee.
and sleep
Bree 988
i know thats how it feels
Bree 988
life is hard.
Bree 988
but you can be stronger then her
mayziee.
i wanstn good enough for her ubt its fine
mayziee.
like why the hell would she go and be freaky with a bunch of guys online
Bree 988
Your right, you were more then enough. he didnt fucking deserve you
Bree 988
she)
Bree 988
but i think we should call her it
mayziee.
no
Bree 988
because thats what it is.
Bree 988
okay
United Kingdom UK
Youre a great person
mayziee.
emily is still a human being, she will learn soon enough
United Kingdom UK
Shes just an idiot
Bree 988
yeah thats true
Bree 988
alot of people are idiots
mayziee.
i know we like barley talk, but the things you telll me, when im good, and js be there for me, it means thr world.
mayziee.
i just wish someone wouldnt hurt me.
Cosmo idk
the people here arent there to hurt you
Bree 988
yeah!
mayziee.
i know
Bree 988
I would rip out their eyelashes and feed it to them if so
Bree 988
<3
mayziee.
i meant have a realtionship
mayziee.
like date someone and
mayziee.
i lvoed her
mayziee.
and she fucking told me taht i was going to far with my frind
Cosmo idk
can also be related to a hollow short curved peice of pasta
mal
?
mayziee.
when she was the one who did
Cosmo idk
elbows
Bree 988
freaky shit
mayziee.
she told me i stooped low.
mal
youre not being helpful
Cosmo idk
an elbow a day...
Bree 988
What the fuck.
mayziee.
by kciking her off the btrix
Bree 988
bro what.
mayziee.
shes fucking toxic and i want her away form yall, and from me.
mayziee.
hats not low.
mayziee.
she hurt me countless time
mayziee.
and i jsut fucking let her.
mayziee.
she littearly stole money form savs kids, and sav is like a mother to me.
mayziee.
and i was there
mayziee.
i couldve never been allowed at her hosue again
mayziee.
she fake dated
mayziee.
some guy while with me one tme
mayziee.
she ran after my brother with a knife
mayziee.
twice
Bree 988
what the hell
Bree 988
shes fucked up.
mayziee.
and some other shit thats js
United Kingdom UK
She needs to be behind bars
mayziee.
she one time tired to make piper(savs kid) dirnk purfume
mayziee.
shewas like 6
mayziee.
or 7 (no joke here)
Bree 988
what the hell?
Cosmo idk
wtf?
mayziee.
yeah
Bree 988
she is fucking mental
mayziee.
and i stoop low?
mayziee.
im too much?
Bree 988
exactly
Bree 988
compared to her, your on a damn plane
Cosmo idk
you stooped low because she made you go down low
mayziee.
i dindt stoop low
Cosmo idk
uh. scissors
Bree 988
?
mayziee.
i dieced when its in my control she wont talk to yall
Cosmo idk
she took you down with her
Cosmo idk
or tried to
mayziee.
uhm.. i dont think bree knows abt that
Bree 988
Yeah. if she tries we can just ignore her retarded ass
mayziee.
it still fucking hurts.
Cosmo idk
yeah lets keep it that way
mayziee.
AND THE FUCKING FACT
mayziee.
THAT SHE
mayziee.
DECIED.
mayziee.
TO GO AND THREATEN LILLY
Cosmo idk
shes not worth your time
Bree 988
let me help you then.
Cosmo idk
it was empty
United Kingdom UK
Feed her to pigs
United Kingdom UK
Legs first
Cosmo idk
theres no way that she can do much to lilly
mayziee.
and emily told me
mal
why couldnt you have just said that....?
mayziee.
that she as going to break up with me anyways becuase im too much
United Kingdom UK
Embarraaasing
mayziee.
but she didnt bcuz she loved me
Cosmo idk
cuz i like messing with you dumbass
Bree 988
YOU'RE TOO MUCH?!
Bree 988
she wasn't enough
mayziee.
if she fucking loved me, she wouldnt have gotten freaky with pedos and random guys on the internet
mal
also youre wrong, me n jomoki send each other elbows daily
Cosmo idk
...
Cosmo idk
wow no wonder ive been feeling more free every day
mal
fr
Cosmo idk
you got rid of my tism
Bree 988
that is actually fucked up
mal
no we prevent each other from getting it
mal
we're not protecting you
mayziee.
i wanna cry
Bree 988
if she truly and absolutely loved you. she wouldnt have even gone in the website itself
United Kingdom UK
No you get more tism everyday
Bree 988
its okay to cry
Cosmo idk
side effects
mal
if anything youd be MORE autistic cus we're not taking it from you
mayziee.
im so fucking sick of this shit
mayziee.
not you guys
Cosmo idk
you're keeping the tism away from me too
mayziee.
i mean shit like em
Bree 988
its ok
mal
no cus we're not sending them to you
Bree 988
do you want to go on call, i dont mind talking if its for you
Cosmo idk
still
mal
you clearly dont understand how it works
Cosmo idk
its like a shockwave
mal
theres no still, i invented the saying so i choose how it works
mayziee.
no im fine
mal
so ha
Bree 988
ok
Cosmo idk
die
mayziee.
id rahter js do smthin to get rid of emtions
mayziee.
ima go bye
mayziee.
ttyl love yall
mal
no
Cosmo idk
now lemme go play with me trains
mal
love you
Bree 988
we love you too charlie
Cosmo idk
(i dont got trains. thats what my friend, bryce has)
United Kingdom UK
Cya,
Cosmo idk
cya charlie
United Kingdom UK
I bet you love trains
Cosmo idk
i dont
Cosmo idk
i like guns
United Kingdom UK
I like knives
Cosmo idk
real
Cosmo idk
sadly you cant like guns in the uk
Cosmo idk
bring the 2A to the UK
Cosmo idk
(2nd ammendment)
United Kingdom UK
What if i liked guns in secret
United Kingdom UK
This is why starma had'nt got shot by now btw
United Kingdom UK
Starma?
United Kingdom UK
Starmer
Cosmo idk
lets hope he gets protested even more for havin his buddies in the epstien files
Cosmo idk
oh god there was this kid in my prgm that was obsessed with epstein
Cosmo idk
so happy to fin be able to prove him wrong
Cosmo idk
epstein liked islam not israel, clinton not trump
United Kingdom UK
He was prolly joking, right?
Cosmo idk
nope
Cosmo idk
he was deadass obsessed with him
Cosmo idk
ugh that kid was a lil permafried
United Kingdom UK
Damn
Cosmo idk
boy did a lil too much ketamine and acid
Cosmo idk
(mal, that was max, btw)
Cosmo idk
wait, uk
United Kingdom UK
Yeah?
Cosmo idk
do you actually not like starmer
Cosmo idk
or am i americasplaining ts
United Kingdom UK
Bro
Cosmo idk
(manspaining but merica_
Cosmo idk
)
United Kingdom UK
Starner stopped me from watching porn
United Kingdom UK
Ofc i hate him
Cosmo idk
use a vpn
United Kingdom UK
Ok jokes aside i actually do hate him
Cosmo idk
mk
Cosmo idk
W
Cosmo idk
bro i actually almost fell into a porn addiction a few weeks ago.
United Kingdom UK
I think britain hates him more than america does
United Kingdom UK
Oh
Cosmo idk
i watch this guy, mahyar tousi (from the middle east but actually pro-UK), and he makes fun of starmer
United Kingdom UK
Ooo
Cosmo idk
make America's Daddy Great again
Cosmo idk
you heard of him?
United Kingdom UK
Nope
Cosmo idk
he does a lot of coverage on islam and the middle east and tommy robinson
United Kingdom UK
If i hated starmer i wouldnt have made a joke abt him getting shot
Cosmo idk
hes hilarious
Cosmo idk
STABBED. DONT MAKE SUCH THREATS UNLESS ITS FOR ALLAH)
United Kingdom UK
.
Cosmo idk
bahaha
United Kingdom UK
British humour
United Kingdom UK
Its the best humour
Cosmo idk
british humour is hilarious
United Kingdom UK
Idk why americans make fun of it
Cosmo idk
sadly im a nationalistic nazi fascist racist so i gotta agree
Cosmo idk
i love it
Cosmo idk
yall gave us good ol grumpy gordon ramsay
Cosmo idk
whats not to like about him
United Kingdom UK
Bro i watch him all the time
United Kingdom UK
Hes hilarious
Cosmo idk
mhm
Cosmo idk
search up tousitv on yt
Cosmo idk
its mainly livestreams but hes got some shorts
Cosmo idk
(hes a fully independent journalist and thats his brand)
United Kingdom UK
Damn his hair looks niice
Cosmo idk
if i had the money id totally join his premium disc server
Cosmo idk
thats his persian roots
Cosmo idk
his dads under house arrest in Iran
United Kingdom UK
Oh
Cosmo idk
yep
Cosmo idk
thats why i love how much he hates the IRGC
Cosmo idk
for him, its personal
Cosmo idk
for me, its just in my national interests as an Israeli and an American citizen
Cosmo idk
and also the irgc is horrid for everyone under it
United Kingdom UK
I dont rlly watch political stuff
Cosmo idk
also he makes fun of the bbc
Cosmo idk
i watch too much political stuff
United Kingdom UK
Bbc is trash tho
United Kingdom UK
Tbf
Cosmo idk
mhm
Cosmo idk
they lovveeeeee the irgc
Cosmo idk
and starmer
Cosmo idk
and prolly epstein
United Kingdom UK
Imagine not having one hot weather lady
Cosmo idk
BAHAHAA
Cosmo idk
also the gaurdians a joke
Cosmo idk
most legacy medias a joke
Cosmo idk
thats why i prefer independent journalism more now
Cosmo idk
(when they have verified sources and dont spin things)
United Kingdom UK
British news in general
United Kingdom UK
Is bad
Cosmo idk
unless its a british persian with an amazing hairstyle
Cosmo idk
that isnt funded by foreign governments
United Kingdom UK
Peak
Cosmo idk
yep
Cosmo idk
gordon ramsay should take over the bbc
Cosmo idk
and the gaurdian
Cosmo idk
and parlaiment
Cosmo idk
and like everything else in the uk
United Kingdom UK
Thats the only british news article thingy i know tbh
Cosmo idk
i dont know much either
Cosmo idk
its just those two that ik
United Kingdom UK
This country is a car crash
Cosmo idk
cuz ive had to cite those for my cambridge stuff
United Kingdom UK
Ew
Cosmo idk
full of gasoline and IEDs and people shouting Allahu Akbar
United Kingdom UK
Not even the food in this country is good
Cosmo idk
idc if people call me islamophobic when its quite obvious that the UK is getting islamified
Cosmo idk
yalls freedom fries are great
Cosmo idk
freedom fries n fish
United Kingdom UK
Cosmo idk
fuck yeah man
Cosmo idk
show ts to starmer for me pls
Cosmo idk
and then he'll ban all memes
Cosmo idk
unless they hate jews
United Kingdom UK
He'll ban images in general
Cosmo idk
then how will he watch his burka durka durka porn
United Kingdom UK
You cant
United Kingdom UK
Thats why this country sucks
Cosmo idk
i feel you man
Cosmo idk
you're welcome to come to america
United Kingdom UK
I would if i had money to move
Cosmo idk
cuz you have parallel ideologues
Cosmo idk
go back in time by three years, say that your a lesbian woman trans goat furry to biden and hello america
Cosmo idk
and dont forget to mention that you identify as retarded
Cosmo idk
that ought to fit the DEI standards
Cosmo idk
i love making fun of foreign governments
Cosmo idk
but remember,
United Kingdom UK
I would too if my political knowledge wasnt lacking
Cosmo idk
keep it that way
Cosmo idk
stay away from politics
United Kingdom UK
Im not a politics fan anyways
Cosmo idk
i hate politics yet its more addicting than porn for me
United Kingdom UK
The only time im exposed to political news is from school assemblies
Cosmo idk
how bad are your school assemblies
United Kingdom UK
Bad
Cosmo idk
tell me more
Cosmo idk
how bad do they get
United Kingdom UK
They either tell us sonething boring abt the school values or talk about politics
United Kingdom UK
Most are just boring
United Kingdom UK
Some sre plain useless
Cosmo idk
you better bring a "i support facism" hat to one
Cosmo idk
that would be funnt
Cosmo idk
y
Cosmo idk
nah thats too far
Cosmo idk
somethin more british
United Kingdom UK
Like a monocle?
Cosmo idk
what politics do they talk about
Cosmo idk
something thats passively aggressively protesting
Cosmo idk
like
Cosmo idk
uh
United Kingdom UK
Cant think of anything
Cosmo idk
"abort me, daddy starmer"
United Kingdom UK
Crazy
Cosmo idk
"starmer, heres a sign that i like living babies"
Cosmo idk
uh
Cosmo idk
"starmer, daddy censorships getting a wank from looking at you"
Cosmo idk
idk how to britishize my humor
Cosmo idk
or just a hat sayin "keir starmers a wanker"
United Kingdom UK
Ykw
Cosmo idk
hm?
United Kingdom UK
Thats a very british humour thing to say
Cosmo idk
it was the british thing to say after the charlie kirk protests in the UK
Cosmo idk
so yeah
Cosmo idk
do that
United Kingdom UK
I dont know abt that stuff
Cosmo idk
it was huge
United Kingdom UK
Did they carry the flame?
Cosmo idk
literally millions
Cosmo idk
id say so
Cosmo idk
pretty damn well
Cosmo idk
they got starmer to talk with trump but starmer didnt do shit cuz hes such a pussy
Cosmo idk
trump sadly missed grabbing that opportunity to teach him a lesson
Cosmo idk
or not as far as he could've
United Kingdom UK
You are what you eat after all
United Kingdom UK
Actually what am i saying
United Kingdom UK
Yk starmer never got puhh
Cosmo idk
he eats anti puhh
United Kingdom UK
He eats dihh
Cosmo idk
but his puhh got so wide that it inverted and took his brain out and it got squeezed into his ahh
United Kingdom UK
Thats probably why his critical thinking skills are so shit
Cosmo idk
exactly
Cosmo idk
im ashamed him to be the guy who leashes the daddy of my country
Cosmo idk
wait that sounds so much worse than i meant it to be
Cosmo idk
cuz the UK aint a fuckin furry
Cosmo idk
its starmers that the furry
mal
67
United Kingdom UK
67
Anonymous (Original Author)
I must say, this is the best any of the Jack and Jill stories have done
Anonymous (Original Author)
In terms of comment activity, that is
Anonymous (Original Author)
Finally getting the credit it's due!
mal
6777777777777777
Anonymous (Original Author)
And thus, a four year chapter is finally closed.
Anonymous (Original Author)
Fittingly conclusive, I suppose, to what has been a long, bumpy journey through words.
Anonymous (Original Author)
I think the lesson we can all learn from this story is that darkness comes in many forms, and it may last even years, but at the end of the day justice is served when justice is due, and the light always shines again.
Anonymous (Original Author)
Anyway, I'll be taking my leave for good now. Jack's story has come to an end, and you're all free to imagine his epiloguous adventures as you see fit. Stay fresh, cheese bags!
United Kingdom UK
676767676767
mal
67777777777777777777776767676767777777777
United Kingdom UK
6
United Kingdom UK
7
United Kingdom UK
67
mal
yes
mal
hru
United Kingdom UK
Im good
United Kingdom UK
Hbu
mal
im ok
United Kingdom UK
Ok is better than bad ig
United Kingdom UK
Whats up?
mal
im exhaustedddd
mal
barely slept this weekend cus i went to church camp
United Kingdom UK
Oh
United Kingdom UK
Relatable
United Kingdom UK
Apart from the fact that its my fault im sleep deprived
mal
lmaoo
United Kingdom UK
Uhh
United Kingdom UK
Ø
mal
woah
United Kingdom UK
ØØØØØ
United Kingdom UK
Rapbøat was rapboats alt account btw
mal
woahhh
United Kingdom UK
Lmao look at whqt i found
mal
BAHAHA
United Kingdom UK
Ive been trying to find more interesting shit
United Kingdom UK
Failed
mal
lmao
United Kingdom UK
Most of the stuff he posts is just grunting and screaming