Outing Jokes

I thought opening a door for a lady was good manners, but she just screamed and flew out of the plane.

Stephen Hawking died because his screw fell out.

If the noose breaks, stab yourself!

If the knife is dull, shoot yourself!

If the gun's out of ammo, *YOU'RE HERE TO SUFFER ETERNALLY.*

TELL ME YOU'VE DONE THIS WITHOUT TELLING ME YOU'VE DONE THIS.!!! So, we all know when y'all were in school, y'all would fart, but y'all would try to make it silent, but for me, that one day I farted loud, and everyone could hear. Everyone got to blame the annoying kid.

I hope you have to squeeze the hell out of toothpaste only for the little bit to fall down the sink drain.

When you find out she was 13 not 30.

Two men in suits are in an image. One man leans in and whispers in the other man's ear. The other man looks surprised. There are children in front of them, as if they are giving a presentation to children.

What do you call 2 emos making out in a science classroom?

My Chemical Romance.

Why did Stephan Hawking not turn up to the meeting?

His internet connection ran out.

Why can't emos come out of the closet to their parents?

Because they won't be there to stick around.

Why is Daisy afraid of candles?

Watch my videos and find out!!! 🤸‍♀️🕯📷💰😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈

I ate Taco Bell last night. I pooped out your hairline.

You're so ugly that when you were born, the doctor threw you out the window, and the window threw you back.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I see you, I see you; you would have to work out.

Are you a noose, 'cause I wanna hang out with you?

Sorry for this Pick Up Line.

Are you a building? Because I rate you 9/11, so let me put my plane in and let kids fall out.

Q: When a chip gets popped, what happens to it?

A: It gets pooped out of the bag.

What's the difference between me and a depressed kid? At least I'm out of the grave.

My mom went to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.

Mummy, how was I born?

Mummy replied, "Well, your father and I got married, and soon I became fat and you came out, and then in, out, in, out, and after you did that a million times, you were born."