When I was a kid, my father would tell me that the black Santa Claus was coming to our house for Christmas. So, instead of putting out cookies and milk, we would put out cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.
Outing Jokes
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
My biology teacher told us "get out nice and sharp colored pencils." Does she mean as sharp as in the blades I use to cut myself?
Why is the older brother's kid brother that has autism always performing fellatio on his older brother?
Because he wants to find out how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop.
In a lesbian relationship, which feminazi cooks?
None, both carpet munchers eat out.
You're so fat, when you wear a yellow raincoat, people call out, "TAXI!"
If you are a girl and your favorite movie as a kid was Mulan, they successfully made a man out of you.
When the feminists find out that it's humanity, not huwomanity.
Why did God steal a rib from Adam and make a woman out of it?
God wanted to show that nothing sensible can come of stealing!
What did one twin say to the other?
"Watch out for the plane!"
Imagine a white van. Now imagine a white guy in the driver seat with a sombrero on and his arm out the window, and on the side of the van it says "Free Candy." But there's blood all over the van and a dead clown in the back.
Yo mom's so old, she went into the museum and walked out with a raise.
What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower?
Unemployed.
Knock it out, you poo-a-loo, go get your loo.
Yo momma's so hairy that when the baby came out, it got rug burn.
The doe comes out of the woods, shakes herself, and says,
"I can't believe I did that for 2 bucks!"
So I walk into Orchids Of Asia. I come out three minutes later with the best massage of my life. What's the catch? Aye, there, matey, the catch of the day be crabs.
I like plants, but then I decided to turn over a new leaf and branch out.
Why was the dog so stressed out?
It had a ruff day.
An Irishman walks out of a bar.
