OR jokes

If your name is Caleb or Connor, you have a problem.

What's one thing you should never ask a suicidal person? "Are you okay?" because the next day they'll either be dead or have a lot more cuts than they started with.

To those who are dead now, was it fun?

You: Its nighttime, shouldn't we be heading to bed?

Boy Roommate: Ok, are you Top or Bottom?

You: Uhhhhhhh

Boy Roommate: No dumby, bunk beds.

You: Thank God.

Boy Roommate: But if you wanna, we can...

You: *faints*

Me: Sister, stop stealing my stuff or I will make you feel bad.

Sister: No, I won't stop.

Me: Fine, I'm telling the world what you did.

Sister: What? You will see when I post it.

Sister: WHY DID YOU TELL THEM I PEED ON SANTA CLAUS WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD?

Me: BECAUSE YOU DON ́T HAVE A LIFE.

What movie do orphans relate to the most?

"Spider-Man: No Way Home." (Either that or Batman.)

One apple a day keeps the doctor away; not logging onto servers using management or service accounts keeps SecOps people away.

The other day all those toilet papers came by my house and asked do I have any crack candy. Naw, I don't have no damn crack candy or no crack apples. All I have here in the backyard is a peanut butter crack sandwich. Help yourself, and while you're at it, clean up all the damn doggie dodo that's everywhere. Thank you, Mr. Toilet Papers.

I despise lumberjacks. They are always barking up the wrong tree, all bark and no bite.

They just need to leaf people alone or stick with something nicer.

What falls quicker off a tree? The leaf or the emo?

The leaf, because the emo is stopped by the rope.

What hit the floor first, the emo or the apple? The apple, the rope stopped the emo.

What fell first, the emo kid or the leaf? The leaf, 'cause the emo kid just hung.

Emo people are like other emo people, they're emo. Laugh now or I'll cut your eyes out. Tee hee!

Do you know what organ remains warm even after a woman dies?

My penis (or rather my neutron laser priming its firing sequence).

Grass is green. I am the queen. If only I can see you scream on the screen.

Things that rhyme with green, queen, screen: clean, between, been, ...

Can an orphan child be arrested for vandalism, or will the officers ask for their parents to talk to?

Who would win in a race, Stephen Hawking or a turtle?

The turtle, because it can walk.

Hello, I am Alan Shawn Feinstein. I would like to know who the owner of this website "worstjokesever.com" is.

I am interested in buying this website. Please respond to me in the comments or email me. Thank you, and keep doing good things.

What are two things you could call a fart?

"Gas from the ass" or "Odor from the motor!"

Hello worstjokesever.com, I am not typing but instead using a microphone to speech, ding me a period.

I don’t see what’s coming up, but I don’t know why I am sending, so it will be random or funny or just stupid, LOL. So like and subscribe and...

What did the 19-year-old say to the 12-year-old?

Wanna play Mario Smash Bros without Mario or his bros?