OR jokes

What happens if a redneck is bisexual? Do they go for their brother or sister?

Do you want to wear my sombrero?

Or is that nacho style?

I went out for a drive and attempted to drift on the road. It didn't end well for me, or for the speed bumps I hit.

Wait, there aren't any road bumps.

O h s h i t.

Ok, so I know most or all of you guys hate me, and that's fine. You guys most likely know me as a horrible person, which I don't know where you would hear that from.

And finally, I am truly a good person; you just need to know me better. The only reason I fought Tina and Jack was because I was trying to be nice to another guy. Then I realized what side I should have been on. I'm pretty sure everyone on this hates me. Just I'm sorry, and just forgive me. Alya, Tina, Jack, and someone else, I think all are nice people; they just stick up for each other, and that's what I realized. So if you still hate me, it's fine; I'll be leaving this app soon, maybe. Hate makes me sad, even though I use it, but I know what was wrong. I want to join the good side, so just give a chance. This was watersharky's Apologies.

Where would Batman get his freak on at? The Batcave or the bat strip club?

Some rules of childhood cricket:

1. Whose bat, his batting.

2. Mother called to go while fielding. Then the turn will not be missed.

3. If the Umpire's decision is not acceptable, the decision of the Spectator, Front Uncle, or Neighbor Aunt shall be final.

When a woman is something weeks or months pregnant and her stomach has a visible bump, everyone rubs her tummy, but no one tickles the husband's balls and says, "Good job, buddy!"

I had a party the other day. I made sure there were vegan options. They make do or fuck off.

Is it a bird? Is it a plane?

I don't know, but it's coming for the towers.

Why can't England play Clash, Chess, or Checkers?

Because they lost their queen.

Which hole talks faster? Your mouth or your ass? Can't tell the difference because they both run shit at once.

Why are most politicians in the closet or gay?

Because all they can do is mandate.

Symptoms of Schizophrenia.

The symptoms of this condition are fairly easy to recognize because they stand out so distinctly from a person’s usual behavior. In order for a diagnosis to be made, the person must suffer from two or more of the following for at least one month:

Delusions

Hallucinations

The Pope drives around in a glass box, or as I like to call him, a sniper's dream.

American-accented, British pronunciation, what am I?

Either Canadian or European.

There has to be someone that hates watersharky. He curses at you if you say one thing about his friends or him. He just is mean and needs to leave.

I am so cool that even the fridge or a snowman would shiver his timbers when they see me :).

Hey, my man, why you got them damn old, stanky-looking Whoopi Goldberg cornrows on you head? Are y'all twins, or boyfriend and girlfriend, 'cause if y'all are, go get married in Color Purple land.

It's been a while since I've talked to either Prince or tj. Do any of you boys wanna chat? Plapls?

Why did I cross the road to might get hit by a car or a bus?