One

One jokes

Nun

    • Two nuns walk into a liquor store, and one asked the clerk for the biggest bottle of Irish whisky he had.

    The clerk replied, "Heck no sister, you nuns aren't supposed to drink that stuff!" The nun said, "Well my son, it is not for us, you see, it is for Mother Teresa," then the nun whispers, "She has the constipation."

    The clerk said, "Oh, in that case, it's on the house. Here's the biggest jug we have." The nuns thank him, bless him, and leave. A few hours later, as the clerk is leaving, he sees the same two sisters in the parking lot, rolling around and drinking the Irish whiskey. Appalled, he goes over to them and says, "You ladies lied to me! You told me it was for Mother Teresa for her constipation!"

    One of the nuns takes another swig, looks up at him and says "You wanna know something buddy? She sure will shit when she sees us!"

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    • One memes

    Kitten

    • Hitler walks into his meeting room, turns to his trusted staff, and says, “I want you to organize the execution of 10,000 Jews and one kitten.”

    Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Goering pipes up. “Mein Fuhrer, why do you want to kill a kitten?”

    Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table. “You see, no one cares about the Jews.”

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    • Girl

    • A girl named Rebecca was friends with a guy called Fi. One day, Fi hit Rebecca, and Rebecca lost service.

    Rebecca said to Fi, "Why-Fi?"

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    • Husband

    • Her husband prepares them a romantic dinner. The wife tells her husband about her desire for it. The husband was clueless about such acts. So, the wife tells him to strip naked on the couch and lay underneath her naked in the reverse missionary position.

    She starts thrusting with his meat inside of her and starts waiting for him to thrust along with her thrusts. However, the husband didn’t know what to do, so he just laid there. Suddenly the wife had an urge to pee, but held it in because her husband’s joystick was right inside her. She loses control after a while and lets one drip out. The wife apologizes profusely and continues thrusting her husband. A couple of minutes later, she feels the urge again and lets another drip of urine run down the husband’s schlong to his pelvis.

    The husband throws the wife from the couch, gets up, and says,

    "Honey, if you think I’ll be screwed by you for more of that, you’re out of your mind."

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    • Self-esteem

    • A teacher wanted to teach her students about self-esteem, so she asked anyone who thought they were stupid to stand up. One kid stood up, and the teacher was surprised. She didn’t think anyone would stand up, so she asked him, “Why did you stand up?” He answered, “I didn’t want to leave you standing up by yourself.”

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    • Dick

    • What is the difference when I have my dick in your mouth or when you have yours in mine?

    Oh, I forgot, you don't got one, bitches, suck my dick.

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    • Police Officer

    • How many police officers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

    Two: one to change the lightbulb, and the other to open fire while the room is dark.

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    • Kid

    • One day this kid says to his dad, "Dad, they bully me at school."

    His dad asks why, and the kid says, "They bully me because I got no hands."

    Then his dad says, "Who would do such a thing like that? I want to know who they are. Point at them!"

    America

    • What's the difference between America and a flash drive?

    One is USA and the other is USB! 😂😂😂

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    • Water

    • Why was Boiling Water hired by NASA (The National Aeronautics and Space Administration) to oversee their Space division? Because it has at least one hundred degrees.