Ocean jokes
What is a pirate's favorite element?
Argon.
Don't tell a Titanic joke, or you'll sink to a whole new low.
Why do sharks never attack lawyers? -- Professional courtesy.
A wild Iceberg appears. Go Titanic! Titanic uses Headbutt. The attack misses. Titanic faints.
What kind of fish comes out at night?
A starfish.
Memes
How do fish get to school?
By the octobus.
Why was the sand wet? Because the sea weed!
Have you heard about the lemming that jumped off a cliff into an ocean?
I heard it was because of pier pressure.
Fishermen are the best at networking.
Police arrested a man who dropped his phone in the ocean. The was charged with a salt in battery.
Once i was walking along the beach and there was a girl with no arms or legs there, i walked by and she said excuse me, will you touch me ive never been touched before, i was like okay so i touched her, i kept on walking along and there was the same girl, she said sir will you kiss me, i went alright so i went up and kissed her, i thought that was weird but anyway i kept walking along and there she was again, she said sir will you fuck me? I went okay so i picked her up and threw her in the ocean and went YOUR FUCKED NOW
What do sheep wear to the beach?
A baa-kini.
What did one fish say to the other?
Keep your mouth shut and you'll never get caught.
Why did the octopus cross the road?
To get to the other TIDE!!! 🤣🐙🐙
What did the cowboy say to the girl on the beach?
"Sandy cheeks."
What do the Titanic and the Montréal Canadiens have in common? They both sank to the bottom of the Atlantic.
Why do scuba divers fall backwards off of the boat?
Because if they fell forward, they'd still be on the boat.
Why did the ocean break up with the pond?
Because the pond was too shallow.
What are fish not allowed to have?
Seaweed.
Why do Pirates say "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"?
First time out at sea, they prepare for battle and say to their commander:
"The canons be ready, Captain!"
"Are," says the Captain (correcting their grammar).
"Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!" they all exclaimed!