Not jokes

Taco

Top 10 Cos:

1. Disco 2. Flamenco 3. Fresco 4. Fiasco 5. Monaco 6. Tobacco 7. Bronco 8. Morocco 9. UNESCO 10. Taco

Pexico? Not top 1000 in my honest book.

Dick

What's the difference between Monday and a dick?

They're not different. They're both unnecessarily long and hard.

Suicide

How do you know the hooker killed herself?

She sniffed the line off the dresser you said not to touch.

Memes

Grenade

What does a baby and a grenade have in common?

They both make noise after you throw them.

Orphanage

I burnt down an orphanage and then showed an orphan the orphanage that I burned down, and he loved it. Not really, though.

Angel

Why do you think after death the angel says do not be afraid?

Search up biblically accurate angels.

Type

You can say he is not your type until you realize your type is not typing.

Lightbulb

How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?

Not 15, as my basement's still dark.

Baby

My wife is pregnant, but when we get to the doctors, something happened...

What happened?

Answer: The husband is pregnant too, with someone else’s baby, not the wife’s baby, but the wife is pregnant with his baby.

Mom

Your mom is so fat that when she went on the scale, it said, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"

Martini

James Bond: Vodka martini.

Bartender: Shaken, not stirred.

James Bond: Do I look like I give a damn?

Everyone

I would tell a Biden joke except everyone would not stop falling asleep (including him).

Orphan

Do orphans eat cereal with water?

Their dad did not come back with the milk.

Orphan

Why do orphans not like 1st-5th grade teachers?

Because they have a home room.