Not jokes
Twin: Hey twin, how's it going?
Twin 2: Weird, twin. Bye.
Twin: Not funny, dude.
If I told you Jeremy Palacios was not GAY!
I'd be a liar.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Not Sally.
If there was a zombie, you would not die because you have no brain.
Why did the chiropractor go to jail? For not paying $75 in back taxes.
Mom died, so I planted mums and forget-me-nots all over her grave site.
Why didn’t Steven Hawking go to heaven? Because it was a stairway, not a rampway.
Did you hear about the story of the husband who told his wife she’d look sexier with her hair back?
Apparently, that’s not a nice thing to say to cancer patients.
A young man cracked a joke about dementia to his friend on the bus. The old man sitting next to him politely asked, “Can you stop making jokes about terminal diseases?”
He replied, “Yes, I cancer.” Then he cracked tumor.
EMINEM: His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy.
WebMD: Cancer.
Yo momma so fat not even Dora could explore her.
So, I was at the gas station drinking a Slurpee when I heard an old lady start talking to me. She says, "Hey, can you check my balance?" so she could buy a chocolate bar.
So, I pushed her over and said, "Not much."
Q: Why can't the orphan buy Robux?
A: He could not use his mother's credit card.
Boy: “My heart MELTS for you.”
Girl: “OMG, are you okay?!?!”
Boy: “Yeah, why?”
Girl: “Because if your heart is melting, then you are NOT okay.”
I went to the orphanage and shot everyone in there. It's not like anyone will attend their funeral.
Top 10 Cos:
1. Disco 2. Flamenco 3. Fresco 4. Fiasco 5. Monaco 6. Tobacco 7. Bronco 8. Morocco 9. UNESCO 10. Taco
Pexico? Not top 1000 in my honest book.
This boy was in school one day when he became desperate to go to the bathroom. So he asked the teacher, “May I use the bathroom?”
The teacher replied, “No, not unless you say your alphabet.”
So the boy said, “a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z.”
When he finished, the teacher asked him, “Where’s the p?”
The boy replied, “Half way down my leg...”
What type of jam can you not eat?
Traffic jam.
Guys, depression cannot be turned into a joke.
Stephen Hawking walking, oops, he does not do that anymore.
I told my cousin since we're not blood-related our parents would let us date.
Her pants were on fire.
Why do seagulls not fly over the bay?
Because if they did, they'd be bay gulls.