Not jokes
Why do orphans not buy a keyboard? Because they can’t use the home button.
Why can orphans not play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Your hairline is so big, not even a black hole can eat it!
A famous celebrity admitted that she was non-straight, suffered from a rare condition that changed the colour of her skin, did not age well, only wanted to be compensated for her work in the 5th month of each year at her favourite store while laying down:
TO GET FAYE'S WAY, PAY GRAY, GRAY, GAY FAYE WRAY IN MAY AND LAY HER DOWN AT "THE BAY". OK!!!
A man walks into his bedroom where his wife is carrying a sheep under her arm and says, "This is the pig I've been fucking."
Wife says, "That's not a pig; that's a sheep, dumbass."
Husband says, "I was talking to the sheep."
Gina: Maryen? Karlya? Amber? Kristie? Why isn't it listed that she's here?
Zari: Your sister isn't listed in the meantime, just relax.
Gina: That still doesn't answer why she's not listed. I want her to see me!
Zari: Anyway, it will be time for your medications, we have the gixen and the Uiasends.
Gina: Do you know my sister's name?
Zari: Yes. Her name is Jalien.
Gina: Fine, I don't care!!!
Hi, I did not get your walk.
A suicide bomber's biggest fear is not exploding.
Not all cat puns are purr-fect; some just have their claws.
What do a 9V battery and a butthole have in common?
We know we’re not supposed to put our tongue on them, but we do it anyway.
Why does an orphan not play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple 'thank you' is all I need.
Not all this 'How did you get in my house?' business.
Man A: "Is Google male or female?"
Man B: "Female, because it does not let you finish the sentence before making a suggestion."
Tons of people committed suicide on 9/11 by destroying government property.
Not to mention and by plane.
Pro lifers: End abortion!!!
Pro lifers after school shooting: But not this abortion.
What is the same between water and dark jokes?
Not everyone gets it!
Why did the toilet paper not make it across the street?
'Cause it got stuck in a pothole!
Akeld: Do you think I should get an edges or a tapeline?
Me: Why not make both of them there? They're both messed up anyway.
I am not telling you twice, your mouth stinks, so go burn your house down like a crazy mad woman, and I will call the cops like, "WTH," because you are so fat.
When it's not just a phase and you kill yourself to prove it.