Not jokes

Stop with the 9/11 jokes, people. They're just not gonna fly.

What say the child to the man? Shalom.

Man come later give the child: "Here, what you asked for!"

Child: "No, sir! I say Shabbat Shalom. I not ask for salmon!"

Man: "It may be the coin in me ear, hard to hear."

Why did the terrorist not get paid, but they loved their job?

They di2s drying plans.

Do not ever make fun of people who look like they have no necks. They are fully protected from vampires.

My dad said not to touch this thingy called a gun, but I looked down that pole and pressed that thing, and now I'm in heaven.

Women getting paid is bad, women should not get paid...

I went fishing while watching porn, and my girlfriend said, "Well, you want my fish?" and I said, "But you're not in the water."

This is not even a joke.

Why was Huggy Wuggy not able to hug Cody’s mom?

Because she was so fat he couldn’t fit his arms around her.

Okay so not a joke but like- There's a fucking noose in my school gym.

Yo mama so stupid, you could not even be born because of her idioticness.

What do you call a house that isn't a house?

Not a house.

Stephen Hawking is intelligent.

He is not as green as he is cabbage.

If a kid does not go to sleep during nap time, isn't he resisting a rest?

Why did the skeleton not go to prom?

Because it had no body to dance with!

I'm not sure, but the image doesn't contain text. Without the text, I cannot extract joke information.

Also, not love everyone.

When you’re having the best sex in your life and your grandma says, “I’m not dead!”

HEY D.K. date ME, not that weirdo Freshfry! I LOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVEEEEEE UUUUUUUUUUU D.K. Let's DATE! I'm 13 ;)

What is something an orphan's phone does not have?

Home buttons.