None jokes

How many people do you think are in a graveyard? Hopefully none.

Men built civilisations. Men went to the moon. Men invented the modern comforts of today’s society.

Women did none of those. They are useless, only fit to be baby making machines.

It's obvious Bill Gates didn't create COVID.

None of his other products are able to release new versions this frequently.

How many emos does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None they just sit in the dark and cry.

Bro wtf is all this!?

Like fr tho none of this be funny... messed up af to joke abt sum shii that ppl go thru.

What songs do people with no arms listen to?

None, 'cause they can’t press play.

There is no god. None, not one.

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Why can’t orphans have sex, my friends? Why? They have none to call daddy.

How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?

None, that's a hardware problem.

Q: How many cops does it take to put in a light bulb? A: None, they just beat the room for being black. 😂😂😂

Why are Americans so shocked when it comes to Mexican drug cartels?

Because none of the drug lords (or their associates, for that matter) have shot up a school.

Why couldn't the girl with no arms hug her parents?

Because she had none of the above.

None of these jokes really took off.

I have so many cash machine jokes.

But none of them seem to work ATM.

I have some jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.

How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, they just sit in the dark and cry.

Have you ever noticed when a woman is pregnant, all her friends touch her stomach and say "congrats," but none of them touch the man's penis and say "well done?"

What's the difference between a chicken and me? None, they both don't watch right and left before crossing the road.

Alicia was not a popular girl. None of the guys noticed her. Once she got a boyfriend, but then he cheated on her with Katy and said, "You're not sexy enough, Katy is much hotter."

So Alicia took a match, set herself on fire, and screamed, "THIS GIRL IS ON FIRE!"

And then she died.