Worst Jokes Ever
I will always remember my uncle's last words, "What's the shovel for?"
What did the hematologist say when his Canadian patient wrote that he's blood type "eh"? "Ah, probably just go with blood typo!"
When is a piece of wood made king?
When it's a ruler.
Bread is like an orphan: plain and stale and no fam.
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Wow, hairy!"
Hey Autocorrect- STOP TAMPERING WITH MY CURSE WORDS YOU MOTHERDUCKING FORKLIFT!
How do you punish Helen Keller?
You leave the plunger in the toilet.
A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing cards...
The steaks were pretty high.
What is the best way to end a cookbook?
And that’s a wrap!
What do you call an autistic kid who just saw Transformers? Autistimus Prime.
Why are Indians dark?
Because they are born and bred in chicken curry.
Why can't melons get married?
Because they cantaloupe.
I heard an unusual word the other day: "Opaque."
Unfortunately, what it means is unclear.
Yo mama so fat, she the iceberg.
My brother has a fucking ass and I wake up to him twerking.
What do cows read? The moospaper!
Why did Obama marry Michelle?
Because he's into chicks with dicks.
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FCC’s
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What do you call a skeleton's egg?
An egg-i-BONE!
What do you call a skeleton's omelet?
A bonelet.