Why was the egg naughty? Because he wanted a good cracking!
If you are talking to an Indian and notice a red dot appear on their forehead, be careful of what you said... They are recording it down... Careful... (no offense) pure joke.
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Yo mama's so stinky that whenever she walks into a building, the flies drop dead!
Joke:What do you call a gay alligator detective? Answer:An Investigator
Girl: Come over.
Orphan: I can’t.
Girl: My parents aren’t home ;)
Orphan: Just two things I don’t have.
What does the cannibal get after a one night stand?
Breakfast in bed!
Knock knock. Who's there? Depression. That's my best friend.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Your mom.
Fuck you you rwind my life.
Y'know what's really sad?
Why break the fourth wall when you can turn the third wheel?
Yo mama so old that when she farts, she farts dust!
why did Sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock! whos there? not sally.
Stairs are bad, because they are always up to something.
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Because she had no arms."
"Why couldn’t she get up off the ground?" "Because she had no friends."
"Knock knock." "Who’s there?" "Not Susie, she’s still on the ground."
"Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?" "Everywhere."
"Why couldn’t Susie scratch her leg?" "Because it was in a different body bag."
"Why did Susie drop her ice cream?" "She was hit by a bus."
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Someone threw a refrigerator at her."
I would tell you a joke about a slice of pizza, but it's really... cheesy. I donut think you will come up with a better pun than this.
Q: Why did the father throw butter out the window?
A: He wanted to see a butterfly.
What’s a bird’s favorite movie?
The Parrots of the Caribbean.
Son: Hey, Dad, why is my name Dick?
Dad: Oh, because a dick fell on you when you were born.
Son: Ohhhhh, so that's why I'm gay.
Q: How do Chinese people name their kids?
A: They throw pots and pans down the stairs and see what noises they make.
I got a new job at a trampoline park the other day. If I’m being honest, it’s got its ups and downs.
