Worst Jokes Ever
Why do I support slavery?
Because I’m white.
It's often said that people peaked in high school.
I think Trump peaked in kindergarten.
I don't beat up midgets.
That would be punching down.
Once a woman suspected that her husband was fucking their daughter at night. So she made a plan. That night, she gave her daughter sleeping pills and told her husband that you go to sleep, I have a headache and I will sleep on the sofa in the drawing room today. After everyone slept, she picked up her sleeping daughter and laid her on the sofa and went to her bed and lay down. After an hour, the door of the room opened and one man entered the room and jumped on the bed and fucked her intensely for 2 hours. Then she turned on the light with the bed switch and said, "You definitely didn't expect me." "I definitely didn't expect you, MOM! But you are more delicious than sister"! Her son replied in surprise!
What was Jesus's favorite sport?
Lacrosse.
What's the difference between a gay rooster and a straight rooster?
Straight rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-doo."
A gay rooster says, "Any cock will do."
Why doesn't The View have anyone on it who is trans? They just look like they are.
I don’t like to play games, actually. There is one game: It’s Barbie. Of course, I’ll be Ken, and you’ll be the box cum in.
Have you heard the word of the day? It’s "legs".
Now, let’s go back to my place and I can spread them.
A school shooter enters a kindergarten classroom. Little Timmy says, “He’s my daddy!”
The teacher, Mr. Mortez, screams. Little Timmy then says, “Mr. Mortez, my daddy says you’re a big fat whale and he wants to roll you all the way to Canada!” *pushes Mr. Mortez* Little Timmy says, “Hail f**king Canada!”
A kindergarten teacher asks her students, "Do you know any words that start with P?"
Little Timmy responds with, "Elmo."
Yo momma so delusional, she thought your grandma's Venus flytrap was Audrey II.
Yo mama so Irish that she thought the Chicago Shamrox were a Quadball team.
What does a burnt pizza, cold beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?
Someone didn’t pull it out in time.
What do you call a flooded hospital?
Vegetable soup.
What do you call two Chinese lesbians?
Two can't chew.
How would negotiations between Putin and Zelensky play out?
QUEUE THE MUSIC
BANG BANG INTO THE ROOM I KNOW U WANT IT
No matter how lonely you get, you have Explain Bear.
Explain Bear is always there for you.
What do black parents and elevators have in common?
Neither of them can raise anything without a belt.
Have you heard of the book about the transgender whale?
It’s called "Maybe Dick."