Bro, you can't be talking. You built like Barney the dinosaur. Barney is a dinosaur with dinosaur sensation.
Worst Jokes Ever
I met a lovely girl at a friend's house party, so I went and introduced myself by saying I'm Noah, what's yours?
She turned around angrily and offended and said, "I identify as a hockey puck, didn't you see the sign?"
To which I replied, "Bitch, that says hickey puck. If you identify as a hockey puck, then let me hit you!"
Roses are red. Sunflowers are yellow.
Your mom is so fat she looks like a marshmallow.
Roses are red, CEO's are white, Patrick Mahomes says, the refs are always right.
You really put the R in special.
Why is Santa's sack always full?
Because he only comes once a year.
Humor is like food, not everybody gets it.
What do lesbians do while having their period?
They finger paint.
Roses are red, the Jews are a cult.
I've practiced Metzitzah b'peh on adults.
What did the skeleton get when he saw goth girls?......A boner.
Why do hospitals have air conditioning?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
Juice WRLD really died, then how is he posting videos today?
It insists upon itself, Lois, it insists upon itself.
What's black and sits on top of a staircase?
Stephen Hawking's after a house fire.
This is 15 first-year treating a swan.
Students return: "Without payment?"
The word "I die with many important problems."
Later, you answer this point: "DSD, rats?"
Everyone becomes happy when they complete the last stage of the game.
But the cancer patients aren't.
A woman can fake an orgasm for the sake of a relationship.
A man can fake a relationship for the sake of an orgasm.
A man accidentally elbows a woman's boob as she is standing behind him in a hotel lobby. The man apologizes profusely and says, "If your heart is as soft as your breasts, I know you'll forgive me."
To which the woman replied, "If your dick is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 318."
The first thing a man looks at in a woman, is her heart.
The fact that her breasts block the view is not her fault.
At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me.
On a related note, I suck at darts.
