Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call it when a Mexican and a pedophile fight each other?
Alien vs. Predator.
Once my friend was saying something dumb, and I was like, "I Campbell-eve you just said that."
"I heard a noise in the basement! I'm gonna go to my friend's house and play Minecraft with him until the noise I heard goes away."
"I heard a noise in the basement. I'm gonna go down there with a bazooka and thirty thousand rounds of pistol ammo and fifty thousand pistols."
Said no horror movie character ever.
And also GTA logic.
What do you call my dick?
A. A monster.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 ate 9.
SEX
To the man in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket, "You can hide but you can't run."
What do you call a person with cancer?
A ghost with a body.
If Bugs Bunny had Down Syndrome:
"Meeeehh, what's up, Downs?"
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? One's made of plastic and dangerous for kids to play with, and the other carries groceries.
Waking up is the second hardest thing in the morning.
Your Parents
What do you call a field of masturbating cattle?
Beef strokin' off.
Doctor, can I please have a new butt? My old one has a hole and a crack in it.
You're gay, lol.
My aunt’s star sign is Cancer, so it’s pretty ironic how she died. She was eaten alive by a giant freaking crab!
An orphan died. No one cared, why? Who is supposed to spread the word? His parents.
I did 9/11 here's proof https://youtu.be/BVH73TonuG8
Where do orphans shop? Home Depot.
What does a news anchor cow say for the weekly broadcast?
"Here's the beef of the week!"