Worst Jokes Ever
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have pockets. I’m
Friend: I'm gonna go ask out my crush.
Me: *fake sneezes* Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit.
Why was 10 scared of 9?
Because 9 8 7.
Where were the first French Fries 🍟 made?
In Greece.
Why did the police go to a baseball game?
Because a player stole the base.
The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet. The student recited the alphabet: "abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz". "Where's the p?" He looked down to the floor and said: "it's running down my legs".
What’s the difference between a hoe and a rooster?
A rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-doo," and a hoe says, "Any cock will do."
"Knife to meet ya."
Where would a snowman go on his days off of work?
Snowhere.
I showed my girlfriend my shotgun yesterday. It really blew her away.
What do bicycles and slaves have in common? They both use chains to work.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Ididap.
Ididap who?
That's the joke, you did a poo!
"Sanderson, fire a warning shot."
"Uhh sir, this is an M32 rotary grenade launcher."
"Ah potato-potato, just pull the trigger."
Why couldn't the astronaut put the helmet on his head?
Because he didn't have enough space.
What has two tires and no engine? A magic house 🏡
Spanish is difficult. When my mom gives me food, she says "toma," and that's drink in English, so I always drink my food.
An alien goes to Area 51, but I wonder why he doesn't go to your house?
Have you ever stepped in Stephen Hawking's house?
Neither has he. 😂😂
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.
My Bff: Hey do want any coffee?
Me: Yeh, of course.
My Bff: Ok which one?
Me: You know... the black one.
Me: Like my soul...
My Bff: Jeez you ok?