Worst Jokes Ever

Everyone is a gangster until Helen Keller hits a 3 on you.

Are you a wild girl, cause I want to catch you with my pokeballs?

What is the difference between onions and babies?

I cry when I cut onions.

Why can't an orphan go to McDonald's? There's no point in the words "happy meal."

An orphan went up to Nikola Tesla and asked to travel in time. He then saw his parents put him in a building, saying, "You now live here!"

Guess what?

Good guess.

An Irishman walks into a pub.

What's the difference between a million dollars and a million dead babies?

I don't have a million dollars laying around my house.

Knock knock!

Who is it?

Knock.

Knock who?

Knock you.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

They don't know where home is. Sorry for the dark joke :>

What time is it when a nurse's here?

It's nurse-thirty.

So I was playing on my phone, and my mom said to go and take the trash out, so I pick up my sister and threw her in the garbage bin and said, "Mom told me to." And when I came back in, my mom said not to do that ever again, but then I told her that she says not to lie, so I was doing the right thing. 👍

Why did the Indian cross the road?

Because he opened a corner shop on the other side.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Golly.

Golly who?

Godly leave me alone!

What state do miners hate?

Oregon.

I can't find out where Stephen Hawking is from, I just can't place his accent.

Run, or something will come to you, and you will be afraid to tell it to stop following you.

What did Hitler say when he was blindfolded?

I can Nazi!

Why was the baseball player stuck in the stadium?

'Cause he made his home run.

What do cats eat for breakfast?

"Mice Krispies!"