Why didn't the bear leave home?
He could not bear leaving his family.
Worst Jokes Ever
How do you punish Helen Keller? Just move the couch.
If olive oil is made of olives, then baby oil is made of...
There are so many things going through my head. Sadly, none of it is a 9mm.
What do tigers wear in the winter?
A striped sweater.
How do we know that the ocean is friendly? It waves.
Nobody:
The Vietcong when America lands on their beaches:
tReE pOwErS aCtIvAtE!
What did the orphan say to the parent?
Oh, wait!
Iran? More like tin can, cause we’re going to kick their teeth in, am I right?
Why did the frog cross the road?
To show his gang that he had guts.
You'll never be lonely at cousinsonly.com.
What did one Koala say to the other?
"Help me I'm burning. Aaaugh!!! Oh fuck oh fuck I'm on fire!! AAAAaugh!"
What is the most musical part of a chicken?
The drumstick.
What's white, black, and red all over?
A zebra who walked into a hunting reserve.
What do you call a happy child swinging with her friends at recess?
Not Sally.
What is the difference between a Taliban outpost and a Pakistani primary school?
I don't know... I just fly the drone.
How to tell your kid he's adopted:
Son, I'm a virgin.
My doctor told me that I had to burn calories, so I took a fat kid and lit them on fire
There's a girl I like in my school, but she's always on her phone. It seems that I can't get a SIGNAL from her.
What's red, takes my belt, and what I got from a weird children's house?
An orphan.
