Worst Jokes Ever
What’s the best way to get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips.
Kid: Aye, Mum, I'mma do something Dad could never do.
Mum: And that is?
*Kid walks out.*
*Kid comes back in with milk.*
Mum: I'mma beat ya ass!
Belief in Egyptian gods is just Ra-ng (wrong). 😁
What does a girl get after having sex with Batman?
Defective rabies.
Mom: They say our kid neighbor has blue blood.
Son: Really?
Also 2 hours later:
Son: Mom, the kid doesn't have blue blood.
Mom: Son, I-
Best chick ever.
Call me at 6969696969.
Q: Where did Lucy go during the bombing?
A: Everywhere!
Warning! Warning! Warning! Warning!
"What? Where?"
God promised John that if he came in 1st, he would get an eternal life, but instead he came in 5th and got a kettle!
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
'Cause there is no home to run to.
What's an emo's favorite Pink Floyd album?
The Final Cut.
What does a bullied kid say during a game of Kahoot?
"I'd like to Kahoot up this school."
What do you call a drunk, depressed man that skydives?
Splattered.
Why can't orphans have a funeral? Because their parents won't be there.
Dark humor is like water.
Not everybody gets it.
I work at a morgue and we wrap the bodies in bubble wrap.
I was working the night shift and just looking at the security cameras, but then I heard popping behind me!
A woman is in the hospital giving birth. The doctor comes up to her afterwards.
Dr: "I'm sorry, I have good news and bad news."
Woman: "What's the bad news?"
Dr: "Your baby is Ginger!"
Woman: "Ok, so what's the good news?"
Dr: "It's dead!"
They asked me to speak at this funeral, and I said, "Of corpse!"
"Why is it that orphans only play tennis?""That's the only love they can get..."
Want to hear a paper joke?
Never mind, it’s too terrible.