Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

I was going to go hunting but then I realized, schools are closed due to covid.

I remember when I was at a funeral at the age of 6. I was with my grandma and asked, "Grandma, Grandma, why is that man in a box?"

And she says, "He's in a better place now." I look at her confused and ask, "What kind of box did he live in before?! How is this box better than the last one?! It's just a box!"

And to this day I am still not allowed to go to funerals.

What do U.S. airstrikes and dark humor have in common?

They're normally pointed towards Africa and the Middle East.

A fat girl was dancing on the table, and I said, "Nice legs." She says, "You really think so?" And I say, "Yes, definitely, most tables would have been broken by now."

One day you see a girl climb a pole and ask her, "Why are you climbing that pole?" "Because a boy paid me to." "He did that to see your underwear." "Oh. Ok."

The next day you see her do the same thing. "Why are you doing the same thing?" "Well, I got him this time. I did not wear underwear."

Why do orphans like to go to church?

Because they can finally call someone "father!"

Perfect dinner joke.

Did you hear about the new movie, "Constipated?"

It hasn’t come out yet.

(Wait, forgot about the 3rd third thing.) I have said this countless times, but it doesn't seem to be getting through to you: quit hating on particular jokes. You don't like it? Nobody cares. Don't go into the morbid jokes category, you idiots, ffs!

I have two things I wanna say:

1. When people swear, stop taking it so fucking literally. If someone calls you a bitch, they're not calling you a female dog. If they call you a cunt, they're not calling you a woman's private part, they are calling you either an idiot, scaredy cat/baby, or something along those lines, ffs.

2. wtf

What can happen if you bring a hooker into a stranger's house? He will ask you, "Really, are you nuts?"

What will happen if someone kicks you right in the balls?

You will be like, "Ow, my nuts!"