Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.
A boy walks up to a girl and says, "I would tell you a joke about my dick, but it’s too long."
Then the girl says, "Yeah, I would tell you a joke about my pussy, but you’ll never get it."
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Tell them to clap until their parents come home.
Why is Johnson’s baby shampoo the best lubricant for anal sex?
- No more tears.
Why can’t orphans go on school trips?
Parent's signature: _________
On a scale of Johnny Depp having an erectile dysfunction to Michael Jackson exposing himself in a child day care center, how hard is it to get into Oxford?
Earth is fun and worstbmaa.
Lucas is a baby, a little girl, ooo!
Your mum is a baby, huh? Not a little baby!
My cousin asked me, "What do you think was going through Hitler's mind right before he died?"
I told him, "Probably a bullet."
"I'm going to sue Disney. Not enough racism!" - Grizzy
If 6 was afraid of seven because 7 8 9 then why was 10 afraid? Because it was right in the middle of 9 11
Your hairline had to "Fahrt" cuz my ass IS your hairline.
What do you do if a woman is choking? Pull out a few inches.
sad sad sad
now you laugh and like
thank you!
go punch an orphan what they gonna do? Tell there parents?
Why are most dark jokes about orphans?
They can't complain to their parents.
What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits a car's windshield at 100 mph?
Its ass.
My elderly relatives like to tease me at weddings, saying, "You'll be next!". They soon stopped though, when I started to do the same to them at funerals.
If you think about it the 9/11 memorial it just a scoreboard
