Worst Jokes Ever
What type of jokes do you tell an orphan?
Family jokes.
12 people on Let's Gooooo.
Your mom is so fat that Dora couldn't explore her.
What's one plus one?
Yo mama.
Your chest is flatter than pre-Aristotle's concept of Earth.
John walked into Pat at the barn. He was dancing naked in front of a tractor. John said, "Hey, Pat, what are you doing?"
Pat said, "Well, me and the wife have been having a bit of trouble in bed, so I went to a therapist, and he said I should do something sexy to a tractor (attract her)."
Classic.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 8 9. Seven ate nine.
Guys, do not follow Tom, he is super inappropriate. I did a 48-hour face reveal and this is what he said:
Tom 13 minutes ago Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ur so cute I wanna fuck your pussy so hard you look amazing I luv ur face come have sex with me mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Why is England so bad at Clash of Clans?
Because they lost their queen.
What did the frog do when his car broke down?
It was toad.
What do you get when you put a vest on an alligator?
An investigator!
"So what, ah, my G?"
A 9-year-old girl lies on a hospital bed struggling to breathe as she waits for the doctor to come.
The doctor finally comes, and the little girl can breathe much easier after he pulls his cock out of her mouth.
Why can't orphans get 5 stars in GTA?
Because they're not wanted.
So the other day, I was looking up zodiac sign stuff, you know, I'm a real big fan of that, and I come across this thing and it’s like all zodiac signs have their own hairstyles... except Cancer.
What do orphans call a family photo?
A selfie.
Why is 10 afraid?
Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Gay.
Gay who?
You're gay.
I got my son a bike for his birthday. The ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair all day crying.
Once, there was a woman who had a husband and a dog. The husband dies.
The dog would always sleep under the bed, and when the woman would go to sleep, she'd put her hand down, and the dog would lick it to say she/he was alright. One night, it was thunderstorming. She put her hand down and the dog licked normally. She heard the dog whimper, so she put her hand down like normal, as the dog always does, he/she licks her hand.
Then she heard dripping coming from the bathroom, so she went to go stop the leaking that might be coming from the tap, but the tap wasn't on, nor was it dripping. She turns on the light and looks up at the roof to see if the roof was leaking but turns out her dog was hung by its head above the bathtub.
On the mirror it said, "Humans can lick too," in the dog's blood.
This is a true story, don't be afraid to look it up!