Roses are red, bow down to your master, children are fast, but I am faster.
Like if you have balls.
Somebody keeps sending me flowers with their heads cut off.
I think I'm being stalked.
Your mum's so fat, she fell into the Grand Canyon and got stuck going down.
I find it bemusing that hardcore right-wingers are superfans of Johnny Depp, considering that he looks like a dangerous Mexican drug lord.
What is the difference between the Twin Towers and the Leaning Tower of Pizza?
One held its balance, the other two fell.
Why do orphans only have 363 days in the year?
Because they don’t have a Mother's nor Father’s Day.
What do a prostitute and peanut butter have in common?
They both spread for bread.
Eat this, peppe.
Did you hear about the emo kid that tried to high-five a tree? It left him hanging.
9/11 jokes are the bomb.
Why do orphans say, "Go big or go home?"
So that way they feel important.
Why did Michael Jackson love melted chocolate? Because he could pour it on his cock, then get a prepubescent boy to suck it off.
Can you imagine what was the last thing that went through their brains?
The knee caps.
I want a relationship.
*Masturbates*
I don't want a relationship.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't see home.
What do you call an Indian with pink hair?
Ghandi floss.
I asked my boyfriend who his favorite motivational speaker was. He said Andrew Tate. I told him the BEST motivational speaker was Stephen Hawking.
Why don't orphans understand dad jokes?
What do you call a group of children who go on strike?
A minor's strike.
