What do orphans get at Xmas?
Lonely.
What did Santa give the mute, blind, quadriplegic orphan at Christmas?
Chlamydia.
What is the other word for an orphan?
Paren't.
How do you make an orphan's hand bleed?
Tell him to clap until his parents come back.
Why are orphans unable to work at S.C. Johnson?
Because it’s a family business.
My ex was an orphan as a child.
I should have taken that as the first sign.
If her parents didn’t want her, why would I?
An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.
I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”
Best way to trick your friends:
A brick falls out of a plane.
How do you put an elephant in the fridge? Open the door, put him in, and close the door.
How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? Open the door, take the poor elephant out, put the giraffe in, and close the door.
The animal kingdom is throwing a party, all the animals are there except for one, who? The giraffe, because he's still in the fridge.
Sally needs to cross the river that is known to be filled with deadly crocodiles, but she crossed safely, how? Because the crocodiles are at the party, but Sally still dies after crossing the river, how? Because she was hit by the flying brick.
Customer: "Can I get this in a smaller size and a different color?"
Employee: "Ma'am, this is an adoption agency, you can't do that here!"
You might think that tigers or lions are the best jumpers, but in my opinion, it's emos, because some of them are still in the air.
What is an orphan's least favorite game?
44 Homes.
What is a group of emos called?
A funeral.
What do you call a pencil with no end?..
Pointless.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite drink?
Milk, because no one came back with any.
What did the plane say to the tower? "Yo, can I crash at your place for a bit, and can my boy crash at your boy's place?"
I was walking today and I saw an emo with a noose looking up at a tree. I simply said, "Hang on there, bud!"
Like if you blow male cows?
What do parents and dark humor have in common? Not everyone gets them.
Your mama is so stupid that she put a ruler under her pillow to see how long she slept.
Your forehead is so big I could stand on it.
