Worst Jokes Ever
A little girl asks her mum, "Mummy how was I born?"
Her mother smiled and replied: "Once upon a time, your daddy and I decided to plant a wonderful little seed. Daddy put it in the earth, and I took care of it every single day."
"The seed slowly grew more and more leaves, and in a few months it turned into a beautiful, healthy plant. So me and Daddy took the plant, dried it, smoked it and got so high that we fucked without a condom!"
Fart a lot.
There is going to be a wild party at the orphanage, the parents aren't home.
What does a man have 3 of, which a girl only has 2 of?
Legs.
A guy wakes up one morning and is walking down the road, and he smells fish, and he says, "Good morning, ladies!"
Why did the cop ask the orphan if he was home alone?
The orphan said because my parents have never come back yet because I have none.
CEO Intrepid entrepreneur born in 1964, Jeffrey, Jeffrey Bezos.
Repeat, come on Jeffrey, you can do it, pave the way, put your back into it, tell us why, show us how, look at where you came from, look at you now.
Zuckerberg and Gates and Musk, they're the anchors, can make and sick it up there with drink their blood, come on Jeff get it! Dododoododododod
What do altar boys and strippers have in common? Father issues.
Why couldn’t the toilet paper make it across the road?
It got stuck in a crack.
What do you do when a French kid steals your pencil?
Load your MP-40 and tell him that you give him a history lesson on WWII.
A young boy was picked up by a strange young man who put him in his car and drove into an abandoned farm.
"This place looks scary," the kid said.
And the man replies, "I know right, I have to walk out of there alone."
What’s an orphan's favorite drink?
Fosters.
I photo bombed someone's selfie, and then they yelled, "Why would you do that? I was trying to take a family photo!"
Why do most orphans cook for themselves?
They don't have a home cook.
What's Link's favorite porn video? The Legend of Zeldas Sucking.
What goes in dry and comes out wet and has white stuff at the end?
Why did Michael Jackson dangle a baby over a balcony?
He wanted to clean out the blanket.
Your mom is so hairy that King Kong got jealous of her.
What do you call an orphan's family portrait?
A selfie.
What is the difference between a dead body and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.