Worst Jokes Ever
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Make them clap until their parents come back.
Just because you‘re suicidal, you don‘t have to be a quitter.
Wait, actually.
Tyler's hairline is so bad.
My dad went out for milk. It's been 15 years and I still have to eat my cereal dry.
Man: Cow milk is drinkable.
Other man: How do you know that?
Man: *smiles with milk all over mouth*
Other man: John...h-how do you know that!
My wife cheated on me with my brother.
She didn't have a sister, so I improvised, and now all I have to do is wait nine months for one to come.
What's the difference between Jesus and a painting of him?
Well, it only takes one nail.
A midget had a disease, and the cure was on the highest shelf.
What do you call a Chinese baby?
Sum Ting Wong.
Dark humor is like food, some just don't get it.
I was in the mood for some dark meat, so I called my black friend.
Virginia is false advertising. Couldn't find many virgins there.
My black friend turned off the lights and suddenly disappeared.
I saw a pretty girl walking outside. I asked for her number.
We met up and began to have sex. She told me to turn over, which was weird. I felt a stinging pain in my ass all of a sudden.
Quiet Kid: *reaches into bag*
Teacher: EVERYBODY RUN!
My friend: You ever feel like life is pointless? *drives faster*
Me: Yea-
My friend: If you could die with one person, who would it be? *speeds up more*
Me: H-hey, you should slow down! Slow down, slow down! We're about to-
I asked my mom with cerebral palsy a question.
Still waiting on an answer.
What falls first from a tree, an apple or an emo?
The apple... the emo just hangs there.
What do orphans call family pictures?
A selfie.
The man was dangling by a string!
I was jealous the day he died.