Myself jokes

The kid in the wheelchair was getting bullied, so I encouraged him to stand up for himself. I don't know why he started crying.

Stephen was a mad role model. He never taught me to stand up for myself.

I love when I could run through the grass and feel the wind on my face.

Then my mom told me to get off VR, and then I wheeled myself to her.

I visited my new friend in his apartment. He told me to make myself at home.

So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.

If I had a dime for every time someone has told me to kill myself, I'd be a millionaire.

When I feel depressed, I like to cut myself another piece of cake.

I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home.

So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.

A person laughs every day.

"Man," they say, "I'm glad I'm not an egg, otherwise I'd just CRACK MYseLf uP!"

This is the account of music provider just let you I post for the enjoyment of myself, and to spread different kinds and types of music willingly. I do not respond for the soul reason of ✨people✨ and do not take offense to anything that I post. If you have and issues or just wanna talk contact me i'm only discord so that's all you getting (not being rude) ill put my discord in the comments.

I was driving through a neighborhood when I saw a sign that said "Autistic Child Zone." Then I thought to myself, "Oh shit, that wasn't a dog!"

Me: *listening to music under a tree and smiling*

Random person who sees me: Awwww look at him, he looks so so happy ^w^

Me: *actually listening to depressing music that makes me wanna kill and end myself but just smiles to show that everything's gonna be fine even if it won't*

I want a job cleaning mirrors. I could really see myself doing it!

Why is it okay to stab meat, but I can't stab myself? These woke lefties, BLM, Antifa, feminists, eco-warriors, pro-vaccine libtards are stopping your freedom and right to stab yourself!

What is my most popular side of myself?

Suicide.

To start off this Christmas season, I'ma make a list of what I want, then I'ma make plans with my family, then to start off my decorations, I'ma start with the first ornament and hang myself.

Are you a mirror, because I see myself in you?

Friend: You ok, man?

Me: Yea... I'll just leave myself "hangin'" tonight...

By the way, could you tell me an elevator pun? I can't seem to "come up" with one myself.

I sexually identify as kilometers per second.

Cuz I really wanna km/s (kill myself).

Is that a mirror in your pocket?

'Cause I can see myself in your pants.