My jokes
I overdosed on Viagra yesterday.
It was the hardest day of my life.
My dog died today. 😥
911 what's your emergency?
"Burning in toaster."
"Toast?"
"Yeah so your calling 911 because of burnt toast?"
"Set fire to my forest!"
I got a new Lego airplane set from my friend... oddly, there were also two towers included in the box as well.
Girl: "Hey, why don't you come over?"
Guy: "I can't. Cops are looking for me, they say I killed 2 people."
Girl: "C'mon, my parents aren't home."
Guy: "About that..."
Hii! Oh my gosh. It has been forever! How have you guys been? Comment your favorite movie!!!! <3
What do the Twin Towers and my ex have in common?
They both fell on my dad.
My dog died. I'm so sad.
I'm 17, right? Anyways, the other day my parents told me a joke they made 17 years ago, but they still haven't told the joke yet.
The joke I'm telling is my brother, Joey.
My dad is really angry at me for kicking the balls. He's the one that told me always aim for them. Is that why I don't have a brother?
Hey, that's the thing my grandpa has. They say that to treat it, I should call him a bitch!
Are you a marry, because you are my mother?
Stop making 9/11 jokes, guys! My uncle died in that event. He was the best Arabian pilot in the world!
Just watched my friend take a steak out of her pocket. That steak was so outta pocket.
My dad is so good at instruments, he said he loves to finger "a minor."
I was going to tell my dad a joke, but he still hasn't come back with the milk yet.
All these jokes really hijacking my mind.
Suck my cheetah.
My anus smells.