Musician jokes
What is Beethoven's favorite vehicle?
A van.
Why did the rapper become a locksmith?
Because he always had the KEYS!
There were three men in a car: the driver, a homeless man, and a rapper. The driver takes them to the woods and says, "I'm not really a cab driver, I'm a wanted killer." The homeless man says, "I'm not really homeless," and pulls out a chain. The rapper says, "If we're gonna be completely honest, I'm not a rapper, I'm a cop!"
What do you call being run over by Michael Jackson?
Being hit by... Being struck by... A smooth criminal.
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite piano note? A minor.
What does Michael Jackson like to drink? Tea-he-he.
What do you call a rapper who's also a PILOT?
Fly Guy
What’s the difference between a firefighter and Snoop Dogg?
Snoop Dogg inhaled less smoke during 9/11.
What's a rapper's favorite type of pet?
A rhyming parrot.
Michael doesn’t fart. Jackson does.
Did you hear about the cello player who dreamed he was performing Bolero?
He woke up and found out it was true.
Why do violists stand for long periods outside of people's houses? They can't find the key and don't know when to come in.
They found out that Michael Jackson was transgender, he went from he/him to hee-hee.
Why was the rapper always the first one at the party?
Because he never missed a beat!
What do Phillip Adam and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
What is Mozart doing right now? -- Decomposing.
Q: What do you use on your tuba when it breaks?
A: Tuba-glue.
"Rapeboat" makes Elton John seem straight.
John Lennon: "What a nice view."
John walked outside.
He got shot.
:skull:
What does Michael Jackson say when he stubs his toe?
Ow!