Musician jokes
I beat up a failed musician until he started crying.
I thought a few hits would cheer him up!
Why was the rapper always in good shape?
Because he never skipped a beat!
Why did the rapper become a weatherman?
To predict the HEAT of his next single.
What do you call a rapper who’s also a DOCTOR?
MC Healer.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES math?
2Pac-square
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to cook?
Lil' Seasoning.
Joe Rogan to Christopher Doemges: "What can you tell me about musicians of the 18th century?" Doemges: "They're all dead already!"
What was the last thing Kurt Cobain said?
"Pop Goes the Weasel."
So apparently, Kurt Cobain's death was mind-blowing.
How do you be friends with a musician?
B minor.
What did the drummer call his 2 twin daughters?
Anna 1 Anna 2.
Oliver Tree just died in a helicopter crash?
He doesn't have to worry about that because, according to him, life goes onionionionionionionionionionion.
What do you get when you cross Freddie Mercury and Dracula?
A dead man with AIDS.
Want to know what Juice WRLD would do if he were alive today?
Frantically scratch on the inside of his coffin.
Why don't rappers ever play baseball?
Because they're too busy dropping hits!
What did the rapper say to his BLENDER?
"Mix it up, yo!"
What did the rapper say to the traffic jam?
"Move over, I'm about to drop some FIRE!"
"Rapeboat" makes Elton John seem straight.
Why was the rapper always the first one at the party?
Because he never missed a beat!
What do you call a rapper who loves gardening?
Dr. Dre-seed.