Music jokes

Why is the Nazi Anthem banned in Germany? Because Horst Wessel lied.

What sound does a nut make when it comes alive?

Christmas!

What is the best Christmas present ever? A broken drum! You just can't beat it!

What do you call an angry reindeer? RUDE-olph!

What is Santa's favorite breakfast? Snowflakes!

What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsel-itis!

Stephen Hawking listens to the song "I Am Still Standing" and cries to himself.

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?

In case of ill rhymes!

How do rappers greet each other?

With a "Mic check, one-two."

Why did the rapper go to school?

To get a degree in RHYMEOLOGY!

I'm gonna open up a bar for emos.

I think I'll call it "The Cutting Board."

Last night I had the strangest dream!

I sailed away to China!

And I caught the coronavirus!

You said you needed to wash your hands!

Didn't want no one else to touch you! What does that mean?!

And you said!!

Ain't nothing gonna break my lungs 😤!

Ain't no way of slowing Covid down!

Oh no I've got to keep on coughing!!!

Why is Michael Jackson so weak?

Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.

They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.

Emos are weird to me because they dress up all black, and you know I don't like that, so that's why I don't like it.

After I am dead during my funeral service, I want someone to play my favorite song by Boy George and Culture Club, "Church of the Poison Mind."

I tried to catch yodeling, but he evolved to yodingalig.

I got a chicken drum stick for lunch, thought I might drum up an appetite!

My son asked me to stop singing Oasis songs in public. I said maybe.

What did the trumpet say to Trump?

"Hi, fellow trumpet!"

What do you call a priest who became a singer?

Michael Jackson.

Liam Gallagher went into a café for a cup of tea. The assistant asked him if "he wanted a roll with it."

Justin Bieber