Why does a cow love music?
Because it can play a moo-sical instrument.
What if Stephen Hawking was the Real Slim Shady, but no one knew because he couldn't stand up?
Orphans are so unwanted that when One Direction saw one, it went the other direction.
Did you hear about the Mexican emo band? They're called "Hispanic at the Disco."
You're so emo, even Billie Eilish can't beat you!
I murdered my friend's brother because he kept saying "HEE HEE" like Michael Jackson when I was trying to have a serious conversation. I just found out he was disabled. That's a THRILLER.
Why is the Nazi Anthem banned in Germany? Because Horst Wessel lied.
What's the difference between Elton John and rapboat?
Elton is talented, rich, and openly gay. Rapboat got fuck all talent, no money, and is not out of the closet yet.
Why did the rapper start gardening?
He wanted to get more ROOTS in his rhymes.
What did the rapper name his new DOG?
Lil Bark.
What’s a rapper’s favorite MUSICAL NOTE?
G major.
Why did the rapper go to school?
To get a degree in RHYMEOLOGY
How do rappers greet each other?
With a "Mic check, one-two."
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
In case of ill rhymes!
I'm gonna open up a bar for emos.
I think I'll call it "The Cutting Board."
Last night I had the strangest dream!
I sailed away to China!
And I caught the coronavirus!
You said you needed to wash your hands!
Didn't want no one else to touch you! What does that mean?!
And you said!!
Ain't nothing gonna break my lungs 😤!
Ain't no way of slowing Covid down!
Oh no I've got to keep on coughing!!!
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite movie?
Black and white.
Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.
They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.
After I am dead during my funeral service, I want someone to play my favorite song by Boy George and Culture Club, "Church of the Poison Mind."
I got a chicken drum stick for lunch, thought I might drum up an appetite!
