Music jokes
I made a playlist for hiking. It has music from Peanuts, the Cranberries, and Eminem.
I call it my trail mix.
It's all fun and games until they start dancing.
What's the difference between red wings and old cassette tape players?
One eats tape while the other eats pussy.
Q: Who is Tracy Latimer's least favorite rapper?
A: Monoxide Child.
What do you call two Hispanics with Parkinson's disease?
Maracas.
When your mama went to Sea World, the whales started singing, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me!"
Only one band is capable of affording the insurance on supercars. UB40!
What do Marie Antoinette and 2005-2012 Korn have in common?
They're both Headless.
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
A man with a drum.
"Well, tell him to beat it!"
What did the skeleton play when he joined the band?
A tromBONE.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument?
A tromboner.
Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle.
I wish my lawn was emo, so I would not have to cut it, it would cut itself.
What's a convict's favorite song?
"I want to break free."
Post Malone was in the hospital, but he is BETTER NOW.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite band?
The Rolling Stones.
If I was a cow and could dance, I'd bust some moooooves while I uddered some lyrics!
Katy Perry can't sing, can't dance, doesn't write music, is unbelievably ugly, and is unable to decipher maths or science. Really though, I didn't realize going down on a record executive would later lead her to be one of the people able to go to space.
Why did the rapper bring a map to the studio?
To find his way to the BEAT!
What did the rapper say to his broken refrigerator?
"Yo, chill!"