Movie jokes
What is Saturn's favorite movie?
Lord of the Rings.
I have a green ball in one hand and one in the other. What am I holding?
Shrek's dick.
Why do orphans not like the movie Frozen?
Because for them, love isn't an open door.
You're so fat that when Thanos snapped his finger, you broke the correction.
My teacher made us watch a movie about the struggles of being an overweight person in this day and age.
It was really heavy on me.
What do you call a movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bill Cosby?
Predator.
What's an emo kid's favorite movie?
Suicide Squad.
What did the cow say when it wanted to go to the movies? -- "Let's go to the moovies!"
I am sick and tired of horror movies; it is always the stupid ones that die first. When you see a guy in a dark, bloody coat and a knife, he ain't there to just look at yah run; don't scream, run!
"Did everyone see that because I will not be doing it again."
- Captain Jack Sparrow
Yo mama so fat that Thanos had to snap twice!
FaceBook Story: My mom loves FaceBook; she literally posts every day, but this day was sort of a hard hit.
So what happened was my mom got tired of her old name on Facebook, so she changed it to Thatmilf85, and I don't want to explain what milf means, but she got a lot of DM's from a lot of old guys. BUT, this one exact guy named Johnny Sins asked my mom if she wanted to do an adult film. I don't know what that is. I think it's an adult movie, of course, so she says yes and flies out to San Diego, and she never came back after yesterday, and to YOU Johnny Sins, my mom better be Ok and that adult film better be an adult movie and not a por...
Harry Potter is a movie about a grown adult man with an unhealthy obsession with a teenage boy.
What did Nemo's dad say? "Man, he's a lot like my dad, I can never find him!"
Look! An ancient African city!
From the makers of Timbukone...
Want to know something? Jason and Michael Myers had to watch their family while they have to live forever. That's why they kill; they're trying to make people experience what they did.
Why does Ezra Miller’s Flash run in a straight line in The Flash movie? Bro ain’t straight.
When do you take a cow to the movies?
On a mooo-vie!
I watched a movie about bones. It was spine-tingling!
Why do orphans hate Fridays?
Family movie night.