Movie

Movie jokes

Titanic

    • "That driving backwards, it creeping me out, you're gonna wreck or something." - Lightning McQueen.

    Because that is what could have saved Titanic, and it wrecked.

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    • Mom

    • FaceBook Story: My mom loves FaceBook; she literally posts every day, but this day was sort of a hard hit.

    So what happened was my mom got tired of her old name on Facebook, so she changed it to Thatmilf85, and I don't want to explain what milf means, but she got a lot of DM's from a lot of old guys. BUT, this one exact guy named Johnny Sins asked my mom if she wanted to do an adult film. I don't know what that is. I think it's an adult movie, of course, so she says yes and flies out to San Diego, and she never came back after yesterday, and to YOU Johnny Sins, my mom better be Ok and that adult film better be an adult movie and not a por...

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    • Movie memes

    Christmas

    • You know how in the movie, "Nightmare Before Christmas," they say they're making Christmas?

    I thought Mary and Joseph did, but okay.

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    • Star Wars

    • Great news for all Star Wars fans who can't wait until the next movie!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QoMlJbLJHcg

    Cheese

    • 1. What do you call cheese that's not yours? Nacho cheese.

    2. Knock, knock. Who's there? Ash. Ash who? Achoo!

    3. How does the ocean say hello? He waves.

    4. Why can't Elsa have a balloon? Because she will let it go.

    5. What do you call your enemy? You don't call it at all.

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    • Family

    • So, there was a kid named Bobby, and he was writing notes. He asked his mother, who was on a phone call, "what is one plus one?" She said, "I HATE YOU." Then he asked his brother what is 2 + 2, who was watching a Batman movie, said, "NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN!" Then he asked his dad what is 4 plus 4, who was playing football, said, "85 SMACK EM DOWN!" Then he asked his sister 8+8, (she was playing with barbies), and she said, "My buns are burning." Then he went to school and told her teacher the first note he wrote down. The teacher sent him to the principal’s office. The principal yelled, "WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!" Bobby said, "NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN!" The principal yelled, "HOW MANY SPANKINGS DO YOU WANT?!" Then he said, "85 SMACK EM DOWN!" Then he walked away from the principal’s office and said, "my buns are burning."

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