What’s the difference between dark humour and morbid humour?

Dark humour is 10 babys in a trash can Morbid humour is 1 baby in 10 trash cans

Why can’t Michael Jackson go within 500 metres of a school?

Because he’s dead

How many baby’s does it take to paint a wall .depends on how many you throw

Remember kids, when you’re angry, burn down an orphanage. Then they’ll really be living the hard knock life.

say this out loud Gabe Itch

say this out loud: alpha Kenny one

I started selling landmines disguised as prayer mats. Prophets are through the roof!

5 out of 6 scientists say Russian Roulette is safe

How do you get a baby into a small bowl? A blender. How do you get it out? Tostito chips.

Welcome to codi’s pizzeria and abortion clinic your lose is our sauce!!!

I decided to visit Saudi Arabia with my girlfriend.

She and I learned they celebrate Pride month by throwing stones.

Most states:

“It’s ok, it won’t be awkward. We’re still friends.”

Alabama:

“She didn’t wanna be my girlfriend anymore. But she said she’ll still be my sister.”

School shooting happens

Foreign exchange student: Sobbing under desk

American student: “First time?”

after a surgery, a man claimed he couldn’t feel his legs, i replied “OF COURSE NOT, I AMPUTATED YOUR F...ING ARMS!”

The colours red, white and blue are the colours of freedom. Until they are flashing behind you.

what’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a carrier bag? One is plastic and dangerous for kids to play with, and the other is a carrier bag.

A teacher is doing an experiment, about taste. she tells each student to line up so she can give them each a lifesaver, so they can tell her what flavor it is. she gives Suzy a pineapple one, Suzy tries it, says the flavor, and then goes and sits back down. that is the same for everyone, then it is Jhonny’s turn, the teacher hands him a honey flavor one, Jhonny chews it for a while, then says, “Teacher, I don’t know what it is.”. the teacher tries to give him a hint and says "it’s what you parents call each other when your alseep". immedietly the boy behind Jhonney screams "spit it out Jhonny it’s an a......!!!"

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