What's worse than waking up with a penis drawn on your face?
Finding out it was traced
Why can't Chinese people play baseball?
Because they eat the bat.
I put the tin foil in the microwave ma
Crispy Juicy Tender, I Just Put My New-Born Son In A Blender
What’s the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? Dogs only lick peanut butter off private parts.
I asked my daddy what sex was he said wanna cum and try it
I found alien in my backyard I put him to work. He went to farm never seen him again moments later he is on daily planet acting as reporter a green rock smashed my house. I called him back he passed out.
I remarked you lazy
Q: What does your Mama and a slinky have in common?
A: They aren't much to look at but you can't help cracking a smile when you see it tumbling down the stairs.
What’s the best part about putting a baby in a blender feet first? Watching their expression change.
(Bus Driver) What did you learn in school today? (Kid) We learned that you are a sussy baka. (Bus Driver) Oh yeah? Well I quit! (Kid) Quit What? (Bus Driver) Living. (Kid) But it was a joke! (Bus Driver) Doesn't matter. I will die but you will still be alive. (Kid) Ok (Bus Driver) That was a joke too!