Morbid jokes
What do 100,000 battered women have in common? The bitch was wrong!
You really can't call Stalin bad, just think about the kids that depression.
I painted my black PS5 white so the controller would run faster.
Why is 7 afraid of 6?
Because 7 is a vegetarian and 6 is a cannibal.
Where did Tanner go during the 9/11 terrorist attack?
Everywhere.
Did you know that there is a new drug on the market for lesbians who are suffering from depression? It's called Trycoxagain.
I was having sex with my girl, and she said she likes it rough, so I socked her in the face.
What part of a vegetable can't you eat?
The wheelchair.
Why did the family move away?
Because they lost their son.
What's better than a pile of dead babies?
One that's alive in the middle that has to eat its way out.
What is white, then red, and is very fast?
My chainsaw blade.
Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, they have a British accent.
Ever heard of a rape victim with Alzheimers? Yeah, neither have they.
What's the difference between a shopping bag and Michael Jackson?
One is white, made of plastic, and dangerous for children. The other is for groceries.
Say, "Crack my fingers."
Now say that backwards...
I will never forget my Grandpa's last words: "What are you doing with that rope and saw?"
Why can't America play chess?
They're missing two towers.
It's funny dating someone smarter than you. My girlfriend knows how to push my buttons but never takes into account what a dick I can be if need be. Let me explain. Say, for example, she calls me retarded, I remind her that she's dating me.
I have something on my lip and I think I’m taller than you.
"Who am I?"
How do you get a Japanese fanclub?
Walk around with a bundle of gas masks!