Momma jokes

Your momma so fat when she stepped on one scale, it broke. When she got another one, it said "TBC." She looked in the mirror, it broke.

Yo momma's titty milk taste like Captain Crunch.

Yo momma is so stupid, she eats cardboard boxes thinking they're chocolate bars.

Yo momma so fat, when she pulled out the chair, it screamed and broke itself.

Yo momma is so ugly, she gets rejected by dead people.

Momma's so fat, she can use her belly button as a breakfast bowl.

Yo momma's so short that she fell off the toilet and broke her leg.

Yo momma so slutty, she could use a tank truck as a dildo.

What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs in the evening?

A kitchen chair! Your momma sits in it for lunch, and your dad only manages to reattach one of the two legs that broke off by evening.

Yo momma so stupid that she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.

Yo momma so fat, I took a photo of her last year and it's still printing.

Your momma's so fat that she's used goods, like the Russian tanks.

Yo momma's so hairy that when the baby came out, it got rug burn.

Little boy: Momma?

Mom: Yes, my dear.

Little boy: One day I wanna work in McDonald's.

Mom: Why!?

Little boy: Just to see if their ice cream machine is actually broken.

Yo momma so fat that she was used as a tank in Putin's war.

Your momma is so fat, when she chose a yellow shirt when she was on a run, the kids ran after her because they thought they missed the bus.

I have a secret crush on your momma.

Yo momma's so fat, she was the iceberg in the Titanic.

Did you hear the passengers on the Titanic invited Yo Momma and the Titanic crew said, "Man overboard!"

Yo momma's so fat, when she bought a fur coat, all animals went extinct.