Mom jokes

Little Johnny says: “Mom, you know that lovely vase in the dining room that’s been handed down from generation to generation?”

Mom replies: “Yes. What about it?”

He says: “Well, the last generation just dropped it.”

Your mom is so stupid, she stopped at a stop sign because it never said "go."

Ur mom loves to eat logs, lmao.

Your hairline and your mom go way back.

Your mom is so small that she can fit in the luggage.

What's the difference between an orphan and Daniel Larusso?

At least Daniel has a mom.

An orphan saw a tornado, and he thought he saw his mom, but then he realized it was a corpse and said, "Hi, Dad!"

My mom told me to recycle the trash. I guess I’m taking you for another bike ride!

An orphan thinks he finally sees his mom, but then he realizes it's air.

Why does the emo's mom like taking her son to the store?

Because the cashier can scan his wrist for discounts!

So I told an orphan if her mom is hot, he wouldn't stop crying.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your mom's house.

Knock knock.

You: Who's there?

Your new father!

When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.

Yo mom is so fat even Dora can explore you!

One day I seen a little boy walking in the grocery store, so I asked if he was okay, and he said yes. I asked where his parents were, and he said his mom died years ago and his dad is stuck in the milk aisle.

My mom told me to look for a bill in her file at her home office. Instead, I grabbed my sister's adoption papers.

So a mom went to her kid and said, "If you pray to God, He will give you your sight back." So he did exactly that.

The next morning, the mom heard a scream, so she went to the kid's room and asked, "What's wrong?" The kid replied, "It didn't work!" The mom said, "April Fools!"

There is someone in my class named Henry Rocket Rueben, and he always says he rockets into my mom.

My mom told me to get dressed, and I said, "For what? Are we going to the rodeo?"

You want to hear a joke?

Your mom.