Mom jokes

About a month ago, I was at my best friend’s funeral and I told him, "Bitches always come and go." He looked at me kinda mad, kinda confused, and said, "That’s my mom, dude."

What's your mom and a dog got in common?

Both will lick dick if you put peanut butter on it.

What does your mom say when she is working?

Nothing, it's rude to talk with your mouth full.

What is the difference between me and the Twin Towers?

My mom was only airplane feeding me a spoon.

Jake: Can I go outside?

Mom: Did you clean your room?

Jake: No.

Mom: Then f*ck no.

Jake: Alright, bet.

(Brother named No)

I asked my mom with cerebral palsy a question.

Still waiting on an answer.

Your Mom's Favorite Book, Chapter 1: How To Cook.

Why did the man get run over?

Ur mom XD

Your mom said my cum tastes like Captain Crunch, bitch.

Tell an orphan "your mom", but then remember he doesn't have one.

My mom went to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.

We have Build-A-Bear; meanwhile, orphans have Build-A-Mom, or if they’d rather, Build-A-Dad.

Your mom is so hot, if she had an OnlyFans page, she would get more money than companies during Pride Month.

There was once a small earthquake, but when I got outside, I realized my brother was still stuck inside. When I told my mom, she just said, "It doesn't matter, you're my favorite anyway!"

I saw a small kid crying, so I asked him, "Where's your mom?" but he started crying, so I left the funeral. 🙂🙂

I saw your forehead and realized your mom and dad's foreheads were as big as yours. Also, you're gay.

Your mom was dating a boy that had a twin brother, but she did it with the wrong one.

Little Johnny says: “Mom, you know that lovely vase in the dining room that’s been handed down from generation to generation?”

Mom replies: “Yes. What about it?”

He says: “Well, the last generation just dropped it.”

Your mom is so stupid, she stopped at a stop sign because it never said "go."

Ur mom loves to eat logs, lmao.