Mom jokes

Your mom is so stupid that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

Why do orphans cry alone?

They do not have a mom's lap to sit on and a shoulder to cry on.

Me: Yo, dude! Yo mama so fat when she walked by the TV, I missed three episodes!

My friend's mom: Why you bully me?

Your forehead is so big that your mom stayed in the delivery room just to give birth to your head.

Knock, knock.

You suck my iron with you and mommy.

I wasn't going to visit my family this December, but my mom promised to make me Eggs Benedict. So I'm going home for the hollandaise.

Your mom is so fat, that burger.

Me when the your, uh, uhhhh, when your me when the your, uhhh, uhhhhh, mom.

If mom saw you, she would die and be happy because of you being ugly.

Ur mom was so fat that even Jon Brower Minnoch was ten times less fat.

The emo kid's mom went to jail because the kid was hung.

Your Mom is so fat, she could be Trump's border wall.

Your mom is so fat that when she went to the dentist, the man said, "One at a time."

A girl with no arms and one leg goes to her mother and asks: "Mom, next year for the carnival, can I dress up as a princess?"

The mother replies: "Why? Didn't you like the ice lolly dress from last year?"

My mom told me to unplug all the electronics, so I unplugged my grandma's life support.

Bf: Babe, do you love me?

Gf: Of course, why do you ask?

Bf: I heard that your mom passed away, and I went to pick some roses for you to try to cheer you up, and then I remembered why I went to the garden.

Son: Mom, can I tell you something?

Mom: Yes, of course, honey, what's up?

Son: Ok, you have terrible jokes! They're not even funny!

Mom: Well, I made you.

One day I asked my mom where kids came from. She said the man who went to the milk store.

Five years later, he came back and left again.

I was digging and found some gold. I was going to tell my mom, then I remembered why I was digging.

Family all eating at the table.

Brother: "Hmm, I think I feel gold."

Sister: "Stop the cap."

Brother looks under the table and says, "Nope, just a gold digger."

Dad laughed.

Stepmom storms out of the room.