Mom Jokes

Like this joke. Ur mom.

Your mom is so ugly Biden likes her.

Kid: I don't want to go to the movies.

Mom: Shut your mouth and clean my room!

One time, little Johnny was watching TikTok, and he saw a toy that he wanted so badly, so he cleaned up the whole house and did his homework. When he was done, he saw a spill on the table. He went to the sink to grab a cloth, but when he came back, it was gone. He went to his mom's room and saw a drink with the label "daddy's drink," so he drunk it and said, "It's daddy's; he won't mind," and all day he was like the Flash. So he went back, turned the bottle around, and it said "Speedy," and then he said, "Oh, great heavens!"

I remember my mom's last words before her divorce, "Did you just load in me?"

The image is a split-panel with two different situations. The top panel shows a person with sunglasses and a big smile and the text "Moms when they see someone they know from work." The bottom panel shows two images of a monkey looking shocked and the text "Kids when they see someone they know at school."

How are shark eggs and your mom the same? They're both the biggest thing ever laid.

What's the best part of not wearing a condom when I'm with my girlfriend? My mom went through menopause.

My mom told me we were flying to a building to see my aunt. I wondered, "Are we about to relive 9/11?"

I love my mom.

I went to ask my friend's mom if I could have a sleepover.

Then I remembered they did not have a mom or dad.

I ate my mom.

Little Johnny woke up at midnight on Christmas Eve to Santa with his pants down on top of his mom. He then said, "Ho ho OH YEAH!!!"

I took the trash to the recycling bin, and two days later, my mom asked me, "Where's your sister?" I said, "In the recycling line to be turned into a bottle."