Mom jokes

This page is for fat jokes, right? Well, I am breaking the mold! Yo Mama so fat! That's not a Joke it's True.

P.S. If your mom is actually fat, then I am sorry that I don't care.

Your mom and dad are never coming back because dad is cumming for another kid.

Mom: Go water the plants.

Me: But it’s raining outside.

Mom: Go grab the umbrella.

Me: What???

Me when the your, uh, uhhhh, when your me when the your, uhhh, uhhhhh, mom.

I wanna date you.

Said mom, dad said no, you are a horrid, f*cking d*ck.

Kids when they meet a kid out of home alone be like: “At least your mom came back!”

*At A Funeral For Someone Who Jumped Off A Building* Victim's Mom: "I wonder what was the last thing that went through his head..."

Me: "Honestly... Probably his ass."

Want to hear a joke? I swear it isn't about my life again.

My mom and dad made a joke together and called it "yeetsu" (me)!

It said to submit a joke, and that's what my mom did when I was born.

The "M" and "D" in "orphan" stands for Mom and Dad.

When your grades get mailed to your house when you expect to get them in school.

When you get home, your mom is there with the belt, going 1k miles per hour.

How do crabs honor their mom’s birthday? The shell-abrate.

Roses are red, violets are blue, my mom and dad died, next you'll be gone too.

Orphan: Can I go outside?

Coworker at orphanage: Go ask your mom.

Orphan: WAWAWAWAWAW

I know what you did with your mom last night, the orphan. Nah, jit trippin', you thought I had one?

A young orphan boy goes to school for the first time. A bigger boy comes and punches him. He says, "What are you gonna do, cry to your mommy?" The boy cries.

Next morning, he wakes up and comes to school. The same thing happens, but the older boy brings his friends. This time, after he says, "You gonna tell your mom?", the little boy says, "Yes, I will tell them that there is company coming over."

Your mom is so hot, if she had an OnlyFans page, she would get more money than companies during Pride Month.

The only people who do yo mama jokes wish they had a mom.

Daughter: So, I got my period.

Mom: That's wonderful, dear! Now you can bleed for a whole week a month without dying!

Daughter: That's nice, Mum, but isn't the whole point of getting your period dying?

Mom: Yes, but you have to kill yourself a little longer to live through to another day.

Daughter: Thanks, Mum. That makes a whole lot of sense. (Sarcastically.)

Mom: You're welcome, honey. (Clueless, obviously.)

Everyone says Kenny has an easy life.

I disagree. I hear his mom likes complicated sex positions.