Mom jokes
Why is your mom ugly, bozo?
I kidnapped an orphan. What are they going to do? Cry for mom?
Roses are red, flowers are pretty, I heard your mom has a nice pair of titties.
Why does the emo's mom like taking her son to the store?
Because the cashier can scan his wrist for discounts!
Little Johnny said he wanted a coffee, so his mom said he can have one.
He got an espresso, not knowing "depresso" came with it.
Being a mom to a teenager will make you understand why some animals eat their young.
Mom: Hey hun, need some money for lunch at school?
Son: No, I got 1k already.
Mom: Wait, what, how?
Son: Mom's wallet is magic.
My sister said to roast her, but my mom said I'm not allowed to burn trash.
Kid at school tells an orphan, "I fucked your mom."
Orphan: "What's a mom?"
When you get mad, just punch an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their mom?
What did the mom say to the twins?
"Go crash a plane!"
My girlfriend's last words:
"I can’t wait to become a mom!"
Your mom is so stupid, she thought eating ass was cannibalism.
What were the orphan's mom and dad's names? John and Jane Doe.
Little Johnny went up to his mom and said: "Can I have some milk?"
He waited for three hours to get an answer.
His mom finally said: "No, your dad still isn't back with it."
Your mom is so fat, every time she turns around, it's her birthday.
"Knock, knock.""Who's there?""Not your dad."Random kid: "My dad went to get milk. My mom said he will be back soon."
Last night I had a dream of lead, but your mom won't let me tell you.
For dinner, this girl had noodles. The next day, she could not find her skinny sister. The mom said, "Your sister is dead!" sadly. The girl asked, "She was skinny, right?" The mom said yes. The sister laughed, "I ate her! That’s why the noodles were very skinny!"
What did mommy spider say to baby spider?
You spend too much time on the web.