Sneak jokes

When do you know your dad knows you are sneaking out? He hears the loud creaks.

Why do emo kids sneak up on their Vietnamese grandfathers? Because they hope the war experience kicks in.

Why can't Mexicans cross the border? They always sneak powder in.

Today was a bittersweet day...

Bad news is my friend was assaulted. Good news is I successfully sneak attacked someone!

She's so ugly, she has to sneak up on a mirror.

Yo mama so fat, when she goes to the movies, she sneaks candy in her fat rolls.

There's this smart way to sneak a calculator into school. I've heard of it. You take the calculator, put it in a gun magazine, put the magazine in the gun, and bring the gun to school!

Teacher: Tell me a moral story.

Little Johnny: Once my grandfather was in WW2. He saw everyone praising to kill him. For example, we should sneak up and kill him. We get the helicopter above and shoot him from there. My grandfather heard this, he got his gun and shot them all.

Teacher: What is the moral even?

Little Johnny: Never plan to kill my grandfather.

Why is leather armor better for sneaking than steel armor?

Leather armor is made of hide.

Why do orphans play with other kids on a playground?

So they will sneak into their parents' car to be a brother or sister.

"Don’t look! I saw you peeking through the window."

When she says "parents aren't home" so you rush upstairs.

Kariana: Dad and mom, what is this bullshit?

Treon: How did you find that?!

Kariana: It was under the cabinet where you told me to put the streamers. I found these under the cabinet, did she have another sister you didn't tell me about? Now tell the truth, or else!

Petina: Now what have we told you about going into things that are not yours!

Kariana: I just told you to say the fricking truth, now who is Faineni? Where is she? Who is she? What is her date of birth? Why do I have her bra under here and why....IS IT UNDER THE FRICKING CABINET!!!!! ANSWER ME!!!!!!!!!

Treon: We can't!

Kariana: BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!